(2013) Looks Could Kill by David Ellis Read Free Book Online

and “perhaps a stranger with no emotional attachment might be better.” The final vote was split with 60% saying ‘yes’ and 40% saying ‘no’.
    Emma moved on to the next question:
    “Now, what about if a patient with a terminal illness wants to die and is able to devise and carry out a way of doing that without involving anyone else. Is it morally right for an individual to do that?”
    The group thought that same principle of autonomy applied as in the first case, so the vote was a unanimous ‘yes’.
    Emma finished off with her last dilemma:
    “Finally, what if a patient with the same terminal illness also wants to die and whilst he/she’s able to devise a way of carrying it out he/she cannot do this without involving others. Is it morally right for someone else to do that?”
    Everyone in the group agreed that this was a dilemma with no clear moral solution, although some thought that if the patient took an active part in the process with assistance from a third party, then this might be morally acceptable.
    Emma concluded that morals and ethics were very difficult to get one’s head around, particularly if it was a head like hers that demanded a fair degree of certainty. She thought it was brave of her to bring her own problem to the group, albeit rather obliquely, although she thought that very few of her year knew anything about it. She’d been told by nice Robert the counsellor that self-harm amongst Oxford students was as common as 1 in 10, particularly in the first year or when Finals was about to happen. That was faintly reassuring, but it did make Emma search the rows of fellow students in the lecture theatre looking for the tell-tale signs of self-harming; it was usually the long sleeves that gave the game away.
     
     
     

November 1983
     
     
    Once Emma had started her first clinical year, medicine suddenly opened up and seemed to escape from the confines of the dissecting room and the endless textbooks filling her shelves. But she found herself frustrated by the constant moving on as she went from one clinical attachment to another. And the never-ending making and breaking of relationships with staff and patients seemed at odds with the therapeutic bond that’s meant to develop over time between doctor and patient.
    There’s no doubt that Emma’s self-harming went a little off the rails during this time and she became a well-known customer at the local Boots, stocking up on steri-strips and plasters. She’d learnt from an early age that drawing attention to her self-harming usually caused more problems than it solved, so self-presenting to an A&E department was a definite no-no.
    So, being so close to home, psychiatry held something of a morbid fascination for Emma.
    One Friday afternoon, when Emma really wished she was doing something entirely different, she found herself waiting to see a new patient that she’d then have to present to the senior registrar. She’d seen a referral letter from a GP, but it was the typical one-liner – “This woman is depressed, please do the needful” – from an overworked, single-handed GP, which gave virtually nothing away.
    “Hello, you must be Julia Thompson,” said Emma, with a beaming smile. “I’m Emma Jones, a medical student, and I’ve been asked to take a full history and do a mental state examination.”
    Emma realised as soon as the words escaped from her mouth that that was a bad start, although that is what the senior registrar had told her to do.
    “Well, no insult meant, love, but I was told I’d be seeing the consultant,” said Mrs Thompson.
    “Oh, yes, you will see the senior registrar, but he asked me to see you first.”
    “No insult meant, love, but you don’t look old enough to be my daughter, and anyway, I was told I’d see the consultant.”
    After this unfortunate introductory sparing, which is commonplace when medical students get asked to see patients without them receiving some forewarning, the two of them reached