9780982307403 by Gregrhi Arawn Love Read Free Book Online Page A

it?”
    “Yes Sir,” he beamed.
    “What do ya say we get those tags off of you, pack
    up the rest of this stuff and get the rest of the class
    so we can get on with our day?” I instructed more
    than asked.

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    “Sure, I mean, yes Sir.”
    Garek packed his treasures as I spoke with the
    ladies, quickly summarizing all that had
    happened since they’d been gone. When he was
    done, Garek stood before us awkwardly.
    “I’m ready,” is all he said.
    “Cool, let’s get out of here and find everyone else.
    Ladies, we shall return.”
    We left the classroom and headed toward the
    library.
    “Mr. Love?”
    “Yes Sir?”
    “I’m sorry.”
    “No need to apologize to me. You didn’t hit me
    with a book.”
    We moved along in resumed silence. When we
    entered the library, Garek found the boy he had
    hit and walked toward him. I heard his sincere
    apology. They shook hands and wandered
    together through the library. Thanking the
    librarian and my assistant for their patience, I

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    signaled for my boys to line up. They did so
    quickly and silently. I led my line with pride as we
    made our way back to class.

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Chapter Four
Birthday Present
    My body welled with fear and anticipation as I
    stood in the middle of the room, staring at the
    door and waiting for it to open. Today I turned
    five. The day had gone on as any other day.
    Except for the moment I was sent to my room,
    there was no mention of my birthday. I was long
    past tired and I was ready for bed. I had been
    shut up in my bedroom for hours since my dinner
    of cold rice and beans, after which Bobby had
    told me to go stand in my room and wait. I knew
    what was coming. Every year it was the same.
    Matthew and Bobby sparring in the living room
    as I sat eating at the table alone. I pretended not
    to see Bobby coaching and encouraging his
    favorite son to do his job while Debbie sat on the
    couch laughing. When I had finished eating and
    washing the dishes I climbed down from the milk
    crates stacked in front of the sink, and Bobby
    seemed to notice me for the first time.

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    “Quit makin’ so much damn noise mufucka!
    What the hell’s yo problem? When you done get
    yo ass to yo room and wait on yo brother. We be
    in there in a minute with yo birthday present.”
    He smiled at Matthew and rumpled his silky
    blonde hair with his enormous black hand. The
    contrast was overwhelming. Bobby loved
    Matthew, and his love was reciprocated without
    question. I could do nothing right and could
    never win favor. I only existed to Bobby to keep
    Debbie in line. He hurt me to punish her.
    Standing there in our room, I wanted to fall over
    asleep just as the door burst open. Seeing
    Matthew’s face smiling up at Bobby aroused an
    unfamiliar feeling inside me. Suddenly I was not
    afraid. Suddenly I was filled with the rage of years
    of abuse and neglect. I wanted what Matthew had
    with Bobby. I wanted the love, the attention, and
    the carefree life.
    “Get in there and kick his ass,” Bobby
    encouraged as he brushed Matthew into the

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    bedroom. Matthew looked at me and sneered. I
    was already in the center of the room, the bed in
    front of me just left of the door, the closet on my
    right, a scatter of broken toys behind me. I had
    memorized the room as I stood there, preparing,
    ready, waiting. For the last two years, Matthew
    and I had fought as brutally as two young boys
    could. Each year I was left bleeding and semi-
    conscious on the floor. Bobby would burst into
    the room and raise his favorite son into his arms
    and abandon me in the darkness of the bedroom.
    This was my birthday present.
    Matthew and I were the same age for one day.
    Each year on my birthday, Bobby would toss
    Matthew and I into our bedroom and warn us
    that only one of us was allowed to emerge. The
    other was to be beaten until he could not get up.
    Each year I lost. Each year Matthew was
    rewarded. I lost because I was not used to fighting
    back. I was accustomed to Bobby’s daily