Any Human Heart by William Boyd Read Free Book Online Page B

about angels and the Virgin Birth.’
    Hard to disagree, I suppose. It turned out that Ben kept bringing the discussion back round to the priest’s vow of celibacy and the difficulties involved in maintaining it. Doig eventually lost his patience and told him to leave forthwith — Ben protesting all the time that if he felt a genuine calling for the priesthood then he had every right to examine all the pros and cons. He said Doig got in a fearful bate and practically hurled him out of the door.
    Anyway, I told him I was going to persevere, come what may, and, now that he wasn’t doing anything perhaps he might be able to help me out: we only had a few weeks left of term and I still had to reach the First XV, let alone play well enough to earn my colours. He said he thought I was a mad fool, but if I wanted to continue I could count on his full and unswerving support.
     
     
Sunday [2 March 1924]
     
    After Mass, just as I was trying to slip away from the church unnoticed, Doig confronted me and drew me back into the shelter of the porch.
    ‘What’s going on, Mountstuart,’ he said, plainly furious, ‘with you and your Jewboy friend?’
    ‘That’s not very charitable, Father,’ I said.
    ‘What’s your game, boy?’
    ‘There’s no game.’
    ‘Lying little gobshite.’
    ‘Leeping was perfectly sincere in his desire to convert,’ said I. ‘In fact I think he found you the disappointment. I’m thinking of writing to the bishop about your feeble proselytizing—’
    Well, he really blew up at that and threatened to report me to the Lizard. I kept a straight and pious face throughout. When I told them about it, Ben and Peter awarded me another sub-magnificent. We all agreed it had been extremely droll.
    After the row, while we were waiting at the bus stop for the bus back to Abbey, Holden-Dawes walked by with a young woman on his arm — quite a pretty young woman. I said ‘good morning’ and he gave me his usual sardonic look, without, however, introducing me to his paramour. I watched them continue on their Sunday stroll, thinking it odd to see H-D with a female; I had always thought him quite sexless, somehow.
     
     
4th March [1924]
     
    Ben said he had been making discreet inquiries about Vanderpoel, seeing if there were any possibilities for blackmail, but as far as he could tell the man was sinless and had no obvious passions for any of the sprats. I wondered if we could get little Montague to whore for us, but Ben wisely counselled caution — corruption of minors and the rest. Then I had my grand idea — not blackmail but bribery. I would bribe Vanderpoel to feign injury, thus opening up a gap in the first team for me. But how much money would we need to seduce the sinless Vanderpoel? Ben was commissioned to be my go-between.
    Letter from Mother bringing pleasing news: Lucy is to join us on our Austrian jaunt. Mother suggests we can amuse ourselves ‘hiking up mountains’. What can she be talking about?
     
     
7th March [1924]
     
    At last. I am selected as Second XV hooker for tomorrow’s match against Walcott Hall (fforde has fflu). Ben has been sounding out Vanderpoel and has discovered that he is not rich (his father is a barrister’s clerk, it turns out) but for all that thinks only the most munificent of bribes will tempt him. How munificent, I ask? Five guineas, Ben reckons. Disaster: even between us we can’t muster a third of that. I will write to Father and ask if I can borrow the money — if I can think of some convincing and worthy cause. On second thoughts I will write to Mother.
     
     
8th March [1924]
     
    Somehow we beat Walcott Hall 64-0, some sort of school record. It appears their ranks were depleted by a chicken-pox epidemic and they had to fill places with the unfit and infirm. It was a joyous rout, actually, and I nearly scored myself, hauled down by three or four men just short of the line. The Second XV preen and strut about the school. fforde claims he will be fit and