Better Than Easy

Better Than Easy by Nick Alexander Read Free Book Online

Book: Better Than Easy by Nick Alexander Read Free Book Online
Authors: Nick Alexander
he’s the slowest man to, you know,
come,
that I’ve ever met.”
    I frown. “And for you girls that’s a
good thing
, right?”
    She nods. “Sure is!” she says.
    I pull a face and shrug. “More than ten minutes of foreplay and I’m bored,” I say.
    Jenny laughs and flicks her hair back again. “Men!” she says. “Tom said the exact same thing. You’re all the same!”
    â€œExcept Doctor Sex,” I say.
    Jenny blushes and flicks her hair yet again. “Except Doctor Sex.”
    â€œSo Jenny has a boyfriend,” I say. I suddenly realise I’m supposed to be noticing something here. “What
exactly
has happened to your hair?” I ask.
    Jenny bounces the edges of her new haircut against her knuckles, shampoo-ad style and frowns at me. “What’s wrong with it?” she asks.
    I shake my head. “Nothing,” I say. “It looks great. It’s just … well, you suddenly look like you fell out of a Garnier advert or something, that’s all.”
    Jenny smirks, blushes slightly, and twists her head as if to demonstrate just how swirly the new hair is. “I kind of forgot about my appearance for a while back there – when I had Sarah, I think. Anyway, I walked into this really posh salon a few weeks ago and said, ‘Fix this.’ I think it’s called coming back to life after having a baby.”
    I push my lips out and nod appreciatively. “I think it’s called cruising your doctor actually,” I say.“Anyway, they sure fixed it. It makes you look heaps younger.”
    â€œThanks. I’m not sure how long it will last though. It seems you have to keep going back there if you want it to carry on looking this way.”
    â€œThe first hit’s free,” I laugh.
    â€œExactly,” Jenny says. “Only it wasn’t. Far from it.”
    â€œSo how did you meet him anyway? He’s not
your
doctor is he?”
    Jenny smirks. “He was, for one visit – for thrush of all things. Very romantic! And then he phoned me and asked me on a date – well, it wasn’t really a date. We talked for ages and I told him I was having trouble meeting people here and so he asked me out for a drink … and then, well, you know how it goes.”
    I grimace. “Thrush?” I say. “Gross. So he saw the goods beforehand so to speak?”
    Jenny blushes and shrugs coyly.
    â€œIs that allowed anyway?” I ask. “Shagging patients?
Patients with thrush!”
    Jenny laughs. “Well no! That’s why I had to find a new doctor. He was very professional about it. We didn’t shag to start with.”
    â€œNot until the thrush had gone,” I say.
    â€œWell … no,” Jenny says. “I changed doctors, and the cream worked and … Actually I think the new one is a lesbian. She’s all plaid shirts and stretch pants.”
    â€œMaybe she’ll ask you out as well.”
    Jenny laughs. “Heaven forbid,” she says. “She’s about eighty.”
    â€œSo is it love?” I ask her. “Or just a good time?”
    Jenny clears her throat and looks thoughtful. “I’m not sure really,” she says, ignoring or missing my Rose Royce reference. “I mean, he’s quite unusual, he’s a bit, you know, metro-sexual, and he has lovely clothes, always very clean and tidy. It makes a change after all that beer and football and shell-suitswith Nick.”
    â€œHe sounds gay!” I laugh.
    Jenny squashes her lips together. “I knew you’d say that, but no, he’s very masculine. Not every straight man is a caveman you know. No, he’s good looking and fun and great company and good in bed …”
    I laugh. “So you
are
in love with him!”
    â€œI’m not that sure I understand the love thing anymore. I mean, I loved Nick, really I did, and he used to give me a black eye every other

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