Beyond Tantra: Healing Through Taoist Sacred Sex by Mieke Wik, Stephan Wik Read Free Book Online Page A

she realized that sometimes when she wears sexy clothes part of her is still uncomfortable and there are traces of the old shame that was handed to in her childhood.
    Now, bring yourself back to the present. With your list in front of you: Put a ‘1’ next to each belief with which both your mind and body still agree.

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    Dealing with Belief Demons – The Belief Awareness Exercise 45
    Put a ‘2’ next to each belief with which your mind disagrees but your body still agrees.
    Put a ‘3’ next to each belief with which your mind still agrees but your body disagrees.
    Put a ‘4’ next to each belief with which your mind and body both disagree.
    When you are finished, take the second sheet of paper. Draw a vertical line to create two columns and label the left-hand column ‘Coherent’ and the right-hand column ‘Incoherent’.
    Now copy all of the statements that you have put a ‘1’ or a ‘4’ next to into the ‘Coherent’ column and all the statements that you have put a ‘2’ or a ‘3’ next to into the ‘Incoherent’ column.
    When you are finished scoring and copying, take turns reading your lists to each other. First read to each other your coherent beliefs and then read your incoherent beliefs. Try to avoid making any comments or discussing anything that you hear. Simply listen to the information you are being given.
    When you are done, go back and have a look at your incoherent beliefs.
    Which ones can you identify as no longer useful or downright unhelpful to developing a positive view of sexuality? Can you write down some new beliefs with which you might replace them?
    The point of the exercise is not to change all of your beliefs suddenly. It’s simply about opening up your mind to the possibility that you may need some new beliefs or understandings about sex. When you are done, file the lists away in a safe place. It can be interesting to go back and have a look at them when you have finished all the exercises in this book and see what, if anything, has changed.

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Chapter 6
Building Trust
    The Understanding
    He who does not trust enough,
    Will not be trusted.
    —Lao Tzu
    Strong sexual feelings and powerful emotions are intimately connected. If you experience fear or anxiety when your Sexual Qi flows, you will tend to revert to actions that allow you to feel safe. These actions are often based on old habits or, if you are under severe threat, instinctive reactions based on your primitive fight or flight mechanism.
    These old habits or instinctive reactions are often not useful if you wish to practice Sacred Sex as they do not allow you to make clear, conscious and informed choices. One way to reduce fear and anxiety is to have a trust-filled relationship. This creates a safe space for Sexual Qi to flow. An excellent way to build informed trust is to practise clear and accurate communication.

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    Beyond Tantra – Healing Through Taoist Sacred Sex The Background
    For most people, it’s not that easy to have trust in your own ability to handle sexual energy. Many people can identify experiences, often from childhood, where their normal curiosity about sex and sexuality landed them in situations where they were ‘in over their heads’ in one way or another. A quite normal reaction to these experiences is to pull back or retreat and to exhibit much greater caution the next time a sexual encounter happens. When this happens over and over again, we build up very deep patterns and habits that are hard to break even with the best will in the world. These patterns and habits are useful for protecting ourselves but not so useful when we want to start learning how to generate and channel Sexual Qi.
    It is possible to unlearn these habits and patterns but it takes courage and determination. You also need to have a situation that provides physical, emotional,