scales and no hair. And it had a bunch of teeth, and claws, and it jumped out of that dude’s chest at me.” Bobby kept looking around until I reached over and grabbed his chin.
“Focus, Bobby. You’re saying that there was a scaly chihuahua inside the dead dude’s chest that jumped out at you? And it had a bunch of teeth and claws? And then you did what, exactly? Get him Taco Bell?” I tried to get him back on track while sniffing around to see if there was any hint of whiskey or something stronger on him. I didn’t smell anything out of the ordinary, but there were so many antiseptic smells in the morgue it was hard for me to figure out what funky smells belonged there and which ones were out of place.
“That ain’t funny. I screamed, and knocked it off me. Then I kicked it over into the corner over there and called you. Then I hid in my drawer. You gonna go find it?” He looked up at me hopefully, and I felt a little bit of what Sabrina must go through all the time at work.
“Yeah, we’re gonna go find it.” I said, with no idea how to go about that, or what we were looking for. “Bobby, you get back in your drawer and hide again. Can you get out later if you need to?”
“Yeah, I rigged that drawer for naps. It’s got a latch on the inside, too.”
“You’re gross. Sabrina, go up to the front desk, flash your badge and put this place on lockdown. Tell them there’s a prisoner loose in the hospital and nobody goes in or out until we’ve got him located.”
She nodded back at me, then paused. “What about emergencies?”
“Have them reroute anything that comes in to Carolinas Medical Center. It’s a Tuesday, and not a full moon, so it shouldn’t be too bad tonight. Besides, CMC is less than a mile away, so it should be fine. Greg, call The Oracle while I try to sniff out anything from this corner.” I headed over to where Bobby had kicked the critter, and saw a slimy mark on the wall about four feet off the floor. I could hear Greg in the background talking to Anna, a witch friend of a friend who has helped us out once or twice. She kinda hated my guts, so I avoided her every chance I got. For some reason she didn’t mind Greg as much, so I let him deal with her. I started calling her The Oracle after a character in a comic book. Something told me she knew about the nickname, and it was just one more reason she didn’t like me. But it was better than calling her Giles.
The slime splattered on the wall had a pale blue tint to it, a welcome change from the stereotypical green and yellow slime. I leaned in and took a whiff, almost falling back on my butt as I got a noseful of sulfur. Whatever this thing was, it definitely wasn’t from around here, and almost certainly had bad intentions. I didn’t have a lot of experience with things that smell like brimstone, but none of the ones I’d met so far were very nice. As a matter of fact, they all kinda wanted to kill me. I kept my head down as I walked to the door, trying to follow the scent of the thing, but I lost it once I got to the hallway. The other hospital scents were just too strong for me to track through. I went back to where Greg was typing furiously on Bobby’s desktop and muttering unpleasant things about Windows Vista and outdated operating systems.
“What have you got?” I asked, before Greg looked up at me in alarm and made a “be quiet” gesture.
“Is that the moron?” Asked Anna’s voice from the cell phone on the desk. I hadn’t realized he still had her on speakerphone, and now she knew I was there. Great.
“Hi, Anna. How are you this evening?” I always tried to start off polite, just so I could maintain my innocence when we started fighting.
“I was doing quite well until I heard your voice, James.” I love the fact that people who don’t like me always call me by my proper name. It’s an easy barometer, really. Anyone who calls me James, or worse, Mr. Black, either wants money or