Brave Beginnings by Ruth Ann Nordin Read Free Book Online Page A

who sat
at opposite ends of the dining table. “The food is delicious. I
probably ate too much at lunch today.”
    Ernest’s mother chuckled. “A skinny thing
like you needs to eat more. I hope you’ll save room for
dessert.”
    With a half-hearted smile, Julia nodded and
folded her hands over the napkin resting in her lap.
    Sure, Mrs. Freeman’s pot roast was savory
compared to the rabbit she and her aunt cooked over the campfire
over a year ago, but the rabbit had tasted better. She knew it had
nothing to do with the meat or Mrs. Freeman’s cooking. It was
because Chogan had been there, eating with them and exchanging
stories about their pasts.
    Julia forced her eyes toward her aunt, well
aware that Ernest studied her. Her face flushed. She didn’t
particularly enjoy being watched, even if she knew his examination
stemmed from concern for her well-being. Perhaps she should be glad
for the way things turned out. She recalled how frightening it had
been to be with the Mandans. The men didn’t cover their bodies like
she was used to, and some of their ceremonial practices spooked her
because they were much more vocal than the churches she’d grown up
in. When it came down to it, she didn’t know if she could ever be
comfortable living there.
    Why Chogan? Of all the men alive, why did it
have to be him? Why didn’t she feel a connection with Ernest? It’d
make much more sense to love Ernest. They came from the same
background and were used to the same things. The choice seemed to
be an obvious one, so shouldn’t she be glad to have a second chance
with him?
    Julia struggled to remember why she said no
when Ernest had asked her to marry him all those years ago. Time
had done its part to cloud her memory. She had a fondness for
Ernest. That she knew. But something didn’t add up. In the years
that passed, she figured it was her duty to Gary that made her say
no. Would she have married Ernest if he hadn’t moved to Fargo? She
glanced his way again and wondered if she’d marry him this time if
he asked.
    He looked pleasant enough. He would not make
her heart race in anticipation like Chogan did, but then,
butterflies in the stomach didn’t ensure a good marriage. No. There
had to be more to sharing a life with someone than physical
attraction. The man and woman had to be amiable toward one another
too, and she had found her encounters with Ernest to be quite
amiable. Maybe not exciting, but they’d been sweet. Surely, she
could work with sweet.
    Maybe it all came down to one simple
question: did she want to end up without a husband and children? It
wasn’t something she gave serious thought to. In fact, for the most
part she developed a sense of peace about being an old maid. And
she still might have had it not been for Chogan. Seeing him again
brought long forgotten dreams to the surface. Maybe she shouldn’t
confine herself to Chogan. If she couldn’t have him, did that mean
she had to forfeit having children?
    At her age, she didn’t exactly have the
luxury of waiting much longer. She’d be twenty-nine in December.
The clock was ticking against her.
    Mrs. Freeman brought out the peach cobbler
for dessert, and Julia forced herself to eat her portion in case
the woman admonished her, once again, for being “too skinny”. As
she ate, Ernest talked about the bank and how he enjoyed working
there. Julia tried to imagine her future with him. She guessed it
would be a lot like this.
    They’d visit his parents and her aunt. He’d
probably discuss his job. She’d be unable to think of much to say,
but she often didn’t have much to say regardless of who was at the
table. His parents would be nice to her, as they’d always been, and
his mother would probably go on a crusade to fatten her up. They’d
mostly likely take turns seeing her aunt and his parents, and
they’d opt to bring her aunt to his parents for the holidays.
    From the future that played out in her mind,
it seemed like such an easy thing to