“May I wash my hands?”
“Certainly,” said Eva, and Kendra asked,
“How did you get this?”
“Luck. Some fellows took out a boat, came back this morning with more salmon than they could eat. Brought the surplus to the store. I’d have been here earlier but I had to finish packing those tools Mr. Sutter ordered. The captain of the launch wants to start back at daybreak tomorrow.”
Eva glanced toward the window. “He’s a brave man. Aren’t we about to have a storm?”
“You never can tell,” said Ted, scrubbing his hands. “Sometimes the clouds hang like this for days with never a drop of rain.” He grinned over his shoulder. “I like San Francisco, Mrs. Taine, but you’re not going to catch me defending the climate.”
Eva laughed, thanked him again for the salmon, and returned to the front room to go on hanging the curtains. Replacing the towel on its rack Ted said to Kendra,
“Shall we step outside and take a look at the weather?”
She agreed, and Ted opened the door to the hall. He smiled at her, Ted’s sweet, beguiling smile, which always gave her such a happy glow when she saw it. As she started to go past him into the hall her arm brushed his.
Without quite meaning to, Kendra paused beside him. Ted looked down at her, his eyes tender and soft as they had been last night at the dance. Again he smiled, slowly, with a look of wonder, as if he had not seen her for a long time and had forgotten she was so enchanting to look at. Kendra did not move. She could not. It was as if she had been caught in a shining web. Slowly, Ted put out his hand and touched her hair. In a low voice he said, “How lovely you are.”
For an exquisite moment they stood still, looking at each other. Then it happened. Ted’s hard bony hands gripped her shoulders and brought her to him. Kendra felt herself go limp with delight. Her eyelashes brushed his cheek, their lips touched, then with a violent movement Ted sprang back from her, and words came out of his throat like gasps of pain.
“Good God, what am I doing?”
He threw her away from him so roughly that she slipped and had to catch the table to keep from falling. Already Ted was rushing away. She heard the clack of his boots in the hall and across the porch and down the steps.
Dizzy with hurt bewilderment, hardly aware that she was moving, Kendra followed him into the hall. In his haste to get away Ted had left the front door open, and she saw him leap on his horse and go dashing down the hill. He did not look back. She could hear the whirring sound of the wind, and through the doorway she saw the fog, blowing past in waves like water.
In a vacant lot near by several small boys were yelling joyously as they built a fort of sticks and clods. A Mexican woodcutter came up the hill, leading a burro loaded with firewood for sale. A wagon creaked into sight, bringing barrels of drinking water from the spring at Sausalito. In another minute the driver would stop here to make his regular delivery, and Eva or Mrs. Riggs would come out to let him in.
While she was not thinking clearly some instinct told Kendra she did not want them to see her now. Unsteadily she crossed the hall and went into her bedroom. As she closed the door she remembered the words of the song the band had played last night.
“Love is like a dragonfly,
Here today, tomorrow gone,
Love’s a teasing passerby,
Blows a kiss and hurries on…”
—Oh Ted, Ted, she cried silently, is that what it means to you?
Though the clouds continued thick all day it did not rain. Kendra cooked the salmon, but she could eat very little of it. When Eva remarked on her lack of appetite Kendra said she thought she was still tired from being up so late at the dance. Speaking of the dance nearly choked her.
All night she was miserably restless, tossing from side to side, waking and dozing and waking again, thinking of Ted.
Did he want her or didn’t he? She had felt so sure! Kendra knew there were men who
Learning to Kill: Stories