Cimarron, Denver Cereal Volume 4 by Claudia Hall Christian Read Free Book Online

to the bathroom. The knob turned.
    She said a silent prayer of thanks to
whatever saint looked after guardians of children whose father was
in a medically induced coma in prison. Shaking her head at her own
insanity, she opened the door.
    “ Noelle?” Sandy stuck her
head in the door.
    Noelle sat in front of the toilet weeping.
When she saw Sandy, she made an animal-like moan and pulled her
knees up to her eyes. Sandy rushed to her side.
    “ What is it, honey? Are you
sick?”
    Noelle jerked away from Sandy. Curling into
herself, the little girl pressed her face into a corner of the
bathroom. Noelle made sounds somewhere close to an injured cat.
Unsure of what to do, Sandy wrapped herself around the weeping
girl. Slowly, gently, Sandy began rocking Noelle like an infant.
While the clock ticked past the start of school, Sandy rocked
Noelle in the tight corner of the bathroom.
    Noelle cried until the flood of sadness was
released. When the desperate storm passed, she sighed. She rubbed
her face against Sandy’s shoulder.
    “ What happened?” Sandy
whispered.
    “ I’m fat,” Noelle
whispered. “I’m so fat. Everybody says I’m fat. I tried to eat less
and I’ve been working out but I’m still fat. FAT! I hate being
fat.”
    “ Honey, you’re not fat,”
Sandy said. “Your Daddy is tall. Your… Nuala is tall. You’re going
to be tall like Daddy and Nash. That’s all. You’re almost taller
than me already. That’s not fat, it’s healthy.”
    “ The cute girls throw up to
stay skinny.” Noelle’s eyes welled with tears. “I can’t even throw
up right. I tried and tried and tried but I can’t do
it.”
    Tears fell from Noelle’s eyes.
    “ I can’t do anything right.
I’m fat and ugly and I can’t even throw up right.”
    Sandy rocked Noelle until she stopped crying
again.
    “ Who do you know that’s
skinny?”
    “ The cute girls at school,”
Noelle said. “They have really cute clothes and…”
    “ You wear a
uniform!”
    “ They have theirs tailored
to be cute,” Noelle said.
    “ Ok, besides school,” Sandy
said. “Who do you know that’s skinny?”
    “ You used to be,” Noelle
said.
    “ Before the baby made me
look like an elephant? Yes, I was thin and small,” Sandy said. “But
I never made myself throw up. Never. Heather and Tanesha? They look
great. Don’t you think?”
    Noelle nodded.
    “ They don’t throw up food,”
Sandy said. “Do you think Mrs. Valerie looks good?”
    “ She’s beautiful,” Noelle
said. “But I don’t want to be that skinny.”
    “ She’s downstairs,” Sandy
said. “Let’s ask her how she stays so skinny.”
    “ She’ll probably lie,”
Noelle said. “Everybody throws up.”
    “ Not me or Heather or
Tanesha or Jill,” Sandy said. “Jill’s in great shape, don’t you
think?”
    Noelle nodded.
    Sandy hefted herself off the bathroom floor.
She held a hand out to Noelle.
    “ Come on, let’s ask Mrs.
Valerie,” Sandy said.
    “ What about school? I’m
late for school!” Noelle’s voice rose with hysteria. “I can’t miss
school. Everyone will be mad at me. And…”
    “ I thought you could spend
the day with me today,” Sandy said. “I was going to run some
errands. Maybe we can get your uniform fixed. Do your hair. I bet
Heather would help you figure out some nice makeup to
wear.”
    Noelle took Sandy’s extended hand and stood.
Sandy hugged the little girl.
    “ Can we have lunch with
Nash and Teddy?”
    “ I don’t see why not,”
Sandy said.
    Noelle visibly brightened at the idea of
having lunch with her brother and his friend.
    “ But first, let’s go talk
to Mrs. Valerie,” Sandy said. “This is a serious thing, Noelle. You
can really hurt yourself and your health by throwing up food. Not
to mention it makes your teeth ugly.”
    “ Oh… oh… I don’t want to
mess up my teeth! They are the one thing that’s actually okay. I
won’t even need braces,” Noelle said. “I just want to
be…”
    “ Perfect,”