closer. I feel the tears beginning as I remember the fear I felt in the dream.
“What else did you see?”
“Not much. It was like I was in and out of consciousness. Just glimpses of the room. I...I remember being scared.”
“It’s okay. You’re okay. I’m here.”
“Do you think it’s a memory?” I ask. “Or just a bad dream?”
“It could be a memory. Your lab tests show you didn’t have much of the drugs in your system.”
“So, I could remember more then?”
“I don’t know, doll. Don’t worry about it. Let’s get you back to bed.”
“’Kay. I’m sorry I interrupted church.”
“Don’t be. You need me, you call me or come get me. I don’t care what I’m doing. Got it?”
“Got it.” He strokes my cheek, and that’s when I see the bandage on the knuckles of his right hand. “What happened to your hand?”
“New tat,” he says as he unwraps the bandage.
I take his hand and inspect it once it’s removed. Each knuckle is inked with a single, bold letter – R-A-V-E-N.
“You tattooed my name on your hand?” I ask in shock.
“When I find the fucker who hurt you, I want him to see your name every time my fist connects with his face.”
His jaw begins to twitch and I see a fire burning in his eyes. No, not fire. More like ice—icy, blue orbs of death. I swallow hard, thinking about what he’s going to do when he finds his mark.
He takes me back to his room and places me on my side of the bed. I watch him as he undresses then turns off the lamp and climbs in next to me. Preparing for our nightly ritual, I roll onto my side and he pulls me into his arms, my back to him. He doesn’t know that I know, but he doesn’t sleep well. Every night, he lies there until exhaustion wins out and sleep finally claims him.
I know because I do the same. I lie here every night, thinking about what happened, where my attacker is, and if he’s coming back for me. I think about Gage and the things he’ll have to do to find him and what he’ll do when he finally does. I think about my father. I think about Laurelyn. We’re both trying to mend fences, but I don’t think I’ll ever trust her. Then I think about Dani and start to feel better. It’s with her on my mind that I’m finally able to fall asleep. Always before Gage, though, and it makes me feel so guilty for being the cause.
“Gage?”
“Hmm?”
“Are you sorry?”
“Sorry for what, babe?”
“Me. Getting involved with me.”
“Raven,” he says quietly. “Turn around.”
I move carefully onto my back, favoring my shoulder, and lower my gaze as he flips the light back on. He positions himself on top of me, cupping my cheek.
“Look at me.”
My eyes meet his reluctantly as he strokes my cheek with his thumb.
“There are a lot of things that I’m sorry about. You are not one of them. You hear me?”
“You should be. Look what I’ve caused.”
“You want to know what you’ve caused? Since I met you, I’m not a miserable motherfucker anymore, moving from one woman to the next and not giving a fuck. I didn’t even realize I was miserable until you came along. You made me want more... better .”
His eyes wander over my face and the adoration in his gaze is almost too much for me to bear. He can’t feel that way. He’s just saying it all to make me feel better. If this hadn’t happened, he probably would have had his fill of me by now and moved on to the next. He’s a good man. Despite all he’s done and what he thinks of himself, there’s a lot of good in him. For him to stick by me through all this, he’s better than most men. This whole situation is just going to push him farther into the darkness that he’s always tried to protect me from – that place where he becomes Reaper, and Gage no longer exists.
“ You’re more,” he continues. “ You’re better...and you’re mine. No matter what.”
“But –”
“But nothing. The answer to your question is ‘no’. I’m not sorry, and I