Cosi Fan Tutti - 5 by Michael Dibdin Read Free Book Online Page A

fuck anybody/
    ‘I’ve got a proposition I want to put to you/ Zen went          on. ‘Is there somewhere we can talk?’
    ‘You want to talk about it?’ the blonde exclaimed in a tone of mock alarm. “I think we’ll pass. This is just too kinky.’
    Zen opened another fold of his wallet and extracted two banknotes. He handed one to each of the prostitutes.
    ‘Here’s a little earnest money. If you don’t like my proposal, you can keep this for your time and trouble. If you do, there’s more where this came from.’
    The brunette hoisted her skirt, revealing a further astonishing length of leg, and tucked the banknote under the strap of her suspender belt. She leaned over and murmured something in dialect to the blonde. After a rapid exchange, she turned back to Zen.
    ‘There’s a bar about four blocks from here. We can talk there.’
    Zen pointed to the fire.
    ‘What about your pitch? You want to arrange for someone to keep an eye on it for you?’
    The blonde smiled.
    ‘That won’t be necessary.’
    ‘Not after what happened to that newcomer who tried to muscle in while we were out of town one weekend/ the brunette explained as they walked over to the waiting cab. ‘She still limps quite heavily, I understand.’
    ‘And you know what?’ the blonde put in. ‘The bitch is making better money now than she ever did before.
    There’s no accounting for taste.’
    ‘Or the lack of it.’
    The bar was a large, anonymous place near the station, patronized at this hour by a few late travellers, a group of railwaymen, a municipal cleaning crew and a battered, bloated woman of indeterminate age who eyed Zen’s companions with a piercing mixture of envy and malicious contempt.
    Zen ordered a mint tea, the brunette an espresso, the blonde a hot chocolate. The only tables had been taken by the travellers and the hostile older woman, so they headed for a quiet corner above a glass display case where a few sad sandwiches lay curling up on metal trays under damp towels.
    ‘We’d better introduce ourselves/ the brunette announced abruptly. “I am Libera.’
    Tolanda/ murmured the blonde, peeking down at her extensive cleavage as though for confirmation.
    Zen hesitated an instant.
    ‘Alfonso Zembla/ he said.
    ‘So let’s hear your proposition, Signor Zembla.’
    Zen removed the tea-bag from his cup.
    ‘In a word, I want you to seduce two young friends of mine.’
    Libera downed her coffee in two large gulps.
    ‘They’re young, you say?’
    ‘In their twenties.’
    ‘Good-looking?’
    ‘Not bad.’
    ‘Well off?’
    ‘Loaded.’
    Iolanda sighed languidly.
    ‘So what’s the catch? The girls should be falling over themselves to get at them.’
    Extending the little finger of his right hand, Zen raised the cup to his lips.
    ‘The catch is that they’re already in love. And faithful.
    Models of devotion and constancy Since they met their respective fidanzate, neither has so much as looked at another woman.’
    The two prostitutes exchanged glances.
    ‘And where do you come in?’ asked Libera.
    Zen turned his head and spat to one side.
     
     
    ‘Those little prigs have been breaking my balls about this for months!’ he exclaimed. ‘They’re just like these hypocritical politicians we have running around now,
    making out they’re some new breed of men, clean, honest and incorruptible, unlike the old shits like us who’ve been running the country since they were crapping in
    their nappies. It makes me sick! Gesualdo and Sabatino claim they’re not like other men, always checking out the room for something fresh and new. God forbid! Their love is the only one worthy of the name, the purest and most perfect emotion which the world has ever seen and which will endure eternally, etcetera, etcetera.’
    ‘How sweet!’ cried Iolanda, placing one hand on her breast.
    ‘You may think so, signorina,’ Zen retorted, ‘but me and the rest of the lads have had just about as much as we can stand. So