Darkness Conjured by Sandy DeLuca Read Free Book Online

maybe I’d be working with you if it weren’t…” She sighed. “I’m sorry, Meg. I didn’t mean it that way.”
    “It’s alright. You were the smart one. You deserve to be in college—to have a good job later.”
    She touched my arm. “You’re smart, too. You just have to believe in yourself a little more. Maybe
    this summer we can sit down and go over options. See what kind of financial aid
is out there. You’d have to start at junior college, but it’ll work out.”
     “Beth, I think I might be sick—or something worse.”
    “What’s wrong?” She yanked my arm, pulled me out of the store and into the entrance of a tiny
tearoom next door. We sat on a bench beneath a Mary Cassette print; a woman
cradling a fat-cheeked child.
    “I haven’t had a period since August. I mean, I’ve gone two or three months before, but it’s different this time. I’m scared.”
    She leaned back on the bench. “You still seeing that Berle kid?”
    “No, not in a while. He got drafted.”
    “Anyone else?” Her voice was a whisper.
    Holiday shoppers whisked by with bundles and children scurried to see Santa who’d just arrived at The Outlet Company store.
    “Around the middle of August I was with this guy, a trucker, but it was one time.
I couldn’t be pregnant from just once.”
    Her eyes flared. “Yes, you could.” She sighed deeply. “You’re in trouble and you’re pretending like life is going to go on like nothing is happening. This isn’t like you. You were the tough one.”
    “I just got lonely, Beth. I got close to somebody who wasn’t straight with me.” I told her when a woman holding a toddler’s hand walked by us.
    “Why didn’t you get checked out?” Beth’s eyes were filled with tears. Her hand trembled when she touched my fingers.
    “I couldn’t get to the clinic downtown. Did you know they stopped the bus run? I mean, I
couldn’t ask Dad.” I let out a tiny sob and then told myself not to break down.
    We sat there in silence. Beth sobbed like a child and I stared at Christmas
decorations hanging around the tearoom arch. Silver angels sparkled and
snowflakes shined. For a moment it looked as though an angel’s eyes mocked me, that blood dripped from its white halo, but it was just lights
reflecting.
    Reality hit me on that November day as I held my sister’s hand, as we watched mothers wheeling babies in strollers and toddlers skipping
towards a fat man dressed in red. I longed for that innocence, for that
unquestioning faith, but I’d lost it and it was time to move on to the truth.

    *     *     *

    It’s early evening and I’m still pissed at my sister Jen. Her life would have been different if she’d followed her heart.
    I make my way down the stairs and hear Marsha speaking softly to someone in the
hall. The words are muffled by Davika singing in the kitchen and Mr. Greely
hammering in one of the offices.
    A few more steps and I realize my father is here. I hear his voice, low and
measured. I guess the news of Jen’s failed attempt at reasoning with me reached him. He’s here to scold me. I wonder what engages him in conversation with Marsha.
    I reach the bottom stair and see my father seated in the main hall. Marsha
crosses her arms when she sees me approach. Her voice is menacing. “Oh, Meg, I was just about to come up to get you.” She sighs, looks to my father and then cringes when Davika sings louder than
before. “I’ll leave you two to chat.”
    She moves away. There’s something off about the way she walks. As though she floats away, casting
elongated shadows on the furniture and walls. I swear I hear bones creak and
low hissing as she enters her office and slams the door.
    Suddenly Davika is silent. The hammering has stopped as well.
    Now I look to my father. He’s haggard. I know he hasn’t sleep in days. His clothes smell fowl. He gazes up at me and then his eyes
drift to my belly.
    “What’s going on? Your sister Jen is upset.”