Diary of a Wimpy Kid by Jeff Kinney Read Free Book Online Page A

was NOT what I asked for. He must've walked into the toy store and picked up the first thing he saw that had the word "Barbie" on it.
    So if you ever see a picture of me where I'm holding a Beach Fun Barbie, now at least you know the whole story.
    [Image: A cartoon showing a picture of a boy holding a Beach Fun Barbie.]
    Dad wasn't real happy when he saw what Uncle Charlie got me. He told me to either throw it out or give it away to charity.
    But I kept it anyway. And OK, I admit maybe I took it out and played with it once or twice.
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    That's how I ended up in the emergency room two weeks later with a pink Barbie shoe stuck up my nose. And believe me, Rodrick has never let me hear the end of THAT.
    [Image: A cartoon showing a boy in the doctor's chamber.]

    Thursday

    Tonight me and Mom went out to get a gift for the Giving Tree at church. The Giving Tree is basically a Secret Santa kind of thing where you get a gift for someone who is needy.
    Mom picked out a red wool sweater for our Giving Tree guy.
    I tried to talk Mom into getting something a lot cooler, like a TV or a slushie machine or something like that.
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    Because imagine if all you got on Christmas was a wool sweater.
    [Image: A cartoon showing a man looking at a wool sweater.] The Caption reads: " Yippee."
    I'm sure our Giving Tree guy will throw his sweater in the trash, along with the ten cans of yams we sent his way during the Thanksgiving Food Drive.

    Christmas

    When I woke up this morning and went downstairs, there were about a million gifts under the Christmas tree. But when I started digging around, there were hardly any gifts with my name on them.
    [Image: A cartoon showing a boy looking at his Christmas gifts.]
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    But Manny made out like a bandit. He got EVERY single thing he circled in the catalog, no lie. So I'll bet he's glad he didn't listen to me.
    [Image: toys.]
    I did find a couple things with my name on them, but they were mostly books and socks and stuff like that.
    I opened my gifts in the corner behind the couch, because I don't like opening gifts near Dad. Whenever someone opens a gift, Dad swoops right in and cleans up after them.
    [Image: A cartoon showing a boy opening his gift.]
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    I gave Manny a toy helicopter and I gave Rodrick a book about rock bands. Rodrick gave me a book, too, but of course he didn't wrap it. The book he got me was "Best of L'il Cutie."
    "L'il Cutie" is the worst comic in the newspaper, and Rodrick knows how much I hate it. I think this is the fourth year in a row I've gotten a "L'il Cutie" book from him.
    [Image: A cartoon showing a boy giving a book to another boy.]
    I gave Mom and Dad their gifts. I get them the same kind of thing every year, but parents eat that stuff up.
    [Image: A cartoon showing a boy giving a gift to his parents.] The Caption reads: " Thanks."
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    The rest of the relatives started showing up around 11:00, and Uncle Charlie came at noon.
    Uncle Charlie brought a big trash bag full of gifts, and he pulled my present out of the top of the bag.
    [Image: A cartoon showing a man giving present to the boy from the trash bag.]
    The package was the exact right size and shape to be a Twisted Wizard game, so I knew Uncle Charlie came through for me. Mom got the camera ready and I tore open my gift.
    [Image: A cartoon showing a boy opening his gift.]
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    But it was just an 8x10 picture of Uncle Charlie.
    [Image: A cartoon showing a boy holding a picture.]
    I guess I didn't do a good job of hiding my disappointment, and Mom got mad. All I can say is, I'm glad I'm still a kid, because if I had to act happy about the kinds of gifts grown-ups get, I don't think I could pull it off.
    [Image: A cartoon showing a lady looking at her gift.] The Caption reads: " Bless this house
    I know the perfect place for this!
    I just knew you'd love it!"
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    I went up to my room to take a break for a while. A couple minutes later, Dad knocked on my door. He told me he had my gift for me out in the garage,