Did You Declare the Corpse? by Patricia Sprinkle Read Free Book Online

Brandi, but Brandi was checking her nail polish and Jim was still plying his fork with single-minded concentration.

    Dorothy looked down at her plate, her cheeks flaming. “Sorry. I didn’t know. Was that a long time ago?”

    That time, Sherry answered. “They started around 1772 and lasted nearly a hundred years. Of course, they were a real boon to America and Canada, because that’s when a lot of Scots came to both countries. That’s why so many of us now go back to celebrate our ancestors.”

    “Don’t whitewash it,” Kenny said sharply. “Thousands of families were kicked out of their homes, sometimes into the snow.” He glared over at Jim again, as if he had personally given the order. “Then the laird’s men either knocked down the houses or burnt them, so the people couldn’t come back.”

    “Sounds like General Sherman,” I said, trying to lighten things up a bit.

    “Just about,” Laura agreed, “except these were their kin-folks they were burning out.”

    Kenny opened his mouth like he had more to say, but Joyce said quickly, “So tell us why you’ve come, Dorothy. Was it just to travel with Marcia, or are you Scottish, too?”

    “Only partly, that I know of. My mother’s people came from Tain, up near the Dornoch Firth.” Her voice was little more than a whisper. “But I’ve always wanted to see Scotland, eh? So when Marcia said she was coming, I said I’d like to come along.”

    Marcia leaned forward and spoke in a confiding tone. “I have an ulterior motive for this trip, too. I’m hoping Dorothy falls in love with a Highland gentleman such as my nephew, who is a few years older than she. If they get married, they can keep me in style when I get old, eh?”

    Dorothy turned bright pink and looked ready to dive under her plate. Fortunately for her, Kenny had a one-track mind. “When did your mother’s people come over, Dorothy?”

    “I haven’t a clue. It was her great-great-grandmother, I think.” Her face was almost as red as Brandi’s nails and she was clearly distressed at being singled out for attention.

    “You ought to find out about them,” Kenny said earnestly. “You never know what you’ll find. I discovered I’m descended from King Robert the Bruce, and we recently found out that one of Sherry’s ancestors—John MacKenzie, who lived in Eilean Donan Castle back in the fourteenth century—actually gave refuge to Robert when he was being hunted by the English. Isn’t that an amazing coincidence?”

    I personally thought that was an amazing feat of boasting, but Brandi asked in a breathless voice, “You’re descended from the king ?”

    Before Kenny could reply, Jim murmured to his wife, “A king who lived seven hundred years ago. By now, anybody could be his descendant.” He shoved back his chair. “Would you excuse me? I need to make a few calls before we take off.”

    The rest of us on that side of the table sucked in our stomachs and pressed against the table edge to let him out. Joyce looked like she wondered if she ought to follow him, but I saw no need to cater to self-centered surliness. “How about you?” I asked her. “Where are you from and why did you come? Have you always been a tour guide?”

    She seemed surprised at being treated like a regular person. “Actually, I’m a frustrated playwright.” She gave an embarrassed little laugh. “I work to support my writing habit. In Auchnagar you will see a short play I was asked to write on the history of the village.”

    That cut off our water. We hadn’t paid good money to attend amateur theatricals.

    Everybody else seemed as blank as I was about what to say next until Laura finally said, “Have you seen a lot of the world?”

    “Yes. I was a flight attendant for twelve years.” She checked her watch. “Eat up, please. We won’t have time for dessert, I’m afraid.” She lowered her voice. “Not that you’re missing much. I am really sorry we couldn’t have had a better