Djinn Rummy by Tom Holt Read Free Book Online Page B

you to ask,’ Jane said. ‘I’d be delighted. ‘
    The genie, whose name was Acme Better Mousetraps IV, blinked twice. ‘You would?’
    Jane nodded and smiled.
    â€˜Straight up?’
    â€˜Absolutely.’
    â€˜I can only do the valeta and the military two-step.’
    â€˜That’s all right, we can learn together.’
    She stood up. Acme Better Mousetraps IV leaned forward, picked her up awkwardly by one arm, and placed her on the palm of his hand.
    â€˜Right,’ he said, as the genie on the stage informed
nobody in particular that they weren’t nothin’ but a hound dog. ‘And one- two-three- one -two-three . . .’
    Kiss shrugged, lolled back in his chair and drained the last few drops of milk into his glass. There was an outside chance that the two of them would discover how much they had in common, form a mature and lasting relationship and leave him in peace, but he doubted it. In the meantime, he resolved, he would just sit here quietly and hope nobody noticed him.
    â€˜Kiss, my man, what’s the big idea?’
    Kiss turned his head. ‘She insisted on coming,’ he replied, as Amalgamated Caribbean Breweries IX sat down beside him and filled two glasses with milk. ‘Then, when Ambi asked her to dance, she accepted. I accept no responsibility whatsoever for anything that has ever happened ever. Is that clear?’
    â€˜Sure.’ Acba sipped his milk and wiped his moustache. ‘You got yourself one crazy mistress there, man. Rather you than me.’
    â€˜Can’t fathom her out at all,’ Kiss replied. ‘So far, all I’ve done is domestic chores and a little light transportation. She hasn’t breathed a word about wealth beyond the dreams of avarice yet.’
    â€˜No?’ Acba raised an eyebrow. ‘Hey, that’s weird. Kind of spooky, you know?’
    â€˜Don’t I just. The only thing I can think of is, her mind’s on something else.’
    â€˜What?’
    Kiss shrugged. ‘Who knows?’ he said. ‘Or cares, come to that? Let’s change the subject, shall we.’
    â€˜Why not?’ Acba grinned. ‘Hey, it’s too bad you being tied up right now. There’s something really heavy going down, and you won’t get to have a piece of it. ‘

    â€˜Is that so?’
    Acba nodded. ‘The word’s out,’ he whispered, ‘for Force Nines and above, excellent package including benefits for hard-working, committed candidate with a total disregard for the value of human life. I’m gonna try and get me a slice of that, no question.’
    Kiss sighed. ‘Sounds like it could be fun,’ he agreed. ‘Any idea what it’s about?’
    Acba shook his head. ‘Whatever it is, it’s serious men running it,’ he said. ‘That’s all I know. Oh, and it’s something to do with the Environment.’
    â€˜Oh,’ said Kiss. ‘That. In that case, it’s probably just cleaning something. You’re welcome to that. Let me know how it pans out.’
    Acba nodded and stood up. ‘Stay loose,’ he said.
    â€˜Chance’d be a fine thing.’
    During this time Abmi and Jane had danced two waltzes, one quick-step and a tango, all to the accompaniment of Blue Suede Shoes . For his part, Abmi was beginning to have serious misgivings about infringing the rule against impossibles.
    â€˜Well, thanks,’ he said, lowering Jane gingerly to floor level. ‘That was an experience, you know?’
    â€˜Oh. Have we finished dancing, then?’
    Abmi smiled wanly. The tendons of his left arm were throbbing like wrenched harpstrings, and there were callouses all over his palm where Jane’s heels had galled him. ‘Hey,’ he said, ‘have you any idea what the guys will do to me, monopolising the foxiest chick in the joint? No way,’ he added, with perhaps a scruple more vehemence than the context could