Eight Days (Love Always #1.5) by D. Nichole King Read Free Book Online

“That’s charming, Ellie. Really.”
    “You’re better than this,” she says, nodding at the cigarette, but I doubt that’s all she means by her statement. “Liam would have wanted—”
    I’m done with her lecture. “I know what he would have wanted.” I toss the butt and shove my hands into my pockets. “It’s the same thing Dad wants. I’ll never live up to it, though, Ellie, so stop. No matter what I do, it won’t bring Liam back.”
    I hold her gaze for a second longer, until I see tears brimming in her eyes. Then, in true Damian style, I sweep past her and jog back into the hospital. As I pass the gift shop, I notice the sales lady is still there doing inventory. I duck inside and sweet talk her into letting me buy up all the flowers they have. It won’t stop the guilt that’s threatening to consume me, I know that.
    I’ve royally fucked up again. With Kate. With Ellie. With my dead brother.
    I take a detour and lay a bouquet of flowers at Ellie’s dad’s door. After how I left her outside, she’ll know they’re from me.
    Then I take the stairs up to the third floor. With my arms loaded down with flowers, it’s difficult to open the door quietly, but I manage. Marcy’s still asleep in the extra bed; my arrival doesn’t disturb her.
    I set the flowers with vases on Kate’s nightstands, and the rest I dump on the window ledge to deal with in the morning. Except one single red rose. I pull it out of the bundle and walk over to Kate’s bed and my empty chair.
    Slowly, I scoot the chair as close to Kate’s head as I can. Beside me, the machines beep in a steady rhythm, and the sound works to undo me. I sit down, holding the rose in my hand, debating. Asking someone for their forgiveness is one thing, asking it of yourself is another.
    I need to decide what the fuck I’m doing. Why, after everything that’s happened, I always seem to wind up here. Beside this girl.
    I don’t know how much time passes as I watch her, fighting to come up with some logical reason for why she captivates me. The only thing I conclude is how pissed off I am at myself for letting her down tonight. It doesn’t make a lick of sense. Neither she nor Ellie is my girlfriend, and I don’t owe them anything.
    Still, it eats away at me.
    Finally, I lay the rose by Kate’s ear and run my fingertips over her face. So beautiful. So fragile. So innocent.
    So not me.
    All of my faults, my weaknesses, my mistakes rush out in one short sentence. “I’m sorry, Katie.”
     
    ~*~
     
    When I finally wake up, it’s after noon. Marcy is gone, leaving Kate and me alone. I should enjoy this. But knowing what I did last night, how I left her for another girl, being alone with her seems like a moment I’m not worthy of.
    I slide my hand over her face, any part of bare skin I can find. Touching Kate isn’t like touching Ellie. It’s like touching something so precious, so special that each time your fingers glide over it, you savor every second. Because someday it might disappear, and you’ll never get a second chance to appreciate it.
    That’s what I’m doing now. Appreciating her.
    I can’t lose this girl.
    Kate, with all her strength, all of her goodness, is exceptional. All that Kate is, I want to hold in my arms and keep for myself. I want her to belong to me and only me.
    Broken, undeserving me.
    I shake my head. How many times have I had to apologize to her? Too many, and I know there’ll be more. It’s what scared shitless people do. Make mistakes and hide behind them.
    My mind travels back to last night with Ellie, how I treated her. Liam would never have done that. My brother was a goddamn saint that I’ll never live up to.
    I clench the muscles in my jaw, my fingers trailing down Kate’s neck. Her skin is too cool. The soft, smooth flesh warms under my touch, and I’d give anything to warm her entire body this way.
    Kate needs her own Liam. Someone I’ll never be, but for her, I’m going to try my damnedest. I