Ella's Wish by Jerry S. Eicher Read Free Book Online Page A

Ella thought, the duty of age comes down with a crash. I am the oldest girl and so held to a higher degree of responsibility . She cleared her throat, but the words still came out of her mouth with great difficulty.
    “I first learned of Eli’s attraction to the Englisha nurse after he came home from the hospital.”
    “That long ago.” Mamm’s voice was a whisper.
    Ella continued. “He told me her name was Pam. He said he had invited her to stop by on her way home from work to check up on him while he was still sick in bed…since she lives north of here somewhere.”
    “She came to my house? When I was not at home?”
    Ella felt guilt grip her hard and take her breath away. Back then the decision had seemed the right thing. Now, with Mamm’s pale face in front of her, she trembled. This had not been her house to allow such privileges, yet she had done so.
    “She came when you were at the funeral of David’s girlfriend,” she managed. “I didn’t know she would come, and Eli had seemed uncertain himself.”
    “But she did come.” Her mom shifted on the couch, and her fingers reached for the handkerchief on the floor.
    “That day she did stop by,” Ella said, “in her nurse’s uniform, and so I figured she just wanted to check up on Eli. I couldn’t just turn her away. I figured Eli would get over her if he saw her again.”
    “You made this decision by yourself?”
    “I’m sorry,” Ella whispered. “It looks different now, and I know now I should have told you. I did try to persuade Eli. I really did. I spoke long and hard with him.”
    “You tried to instruct your brother?” her mom asked, standing to her feet. “I’m ashamed of you, Ella. I thought we taught you better than that. Have the lessons of our leaders no meanin’ to you? In these spiritual things—in matters of Scripture and the tradition of the fathers—it is not up to us women to teach the men. We will always fail. As you have failed. Do you not know this? The matter belonged to your daett…by the design of Da Hah Himself. Do you not know that after all these years?”
    Ella’s face burned like fire, and she could say nothing in her defense.
    “I knew too,” Dora offered in what Ella knew was an attempt to share blame. She felt a rush of emotion at her sister’s thoughtfulness.
    “Ella is the oldest girl,” her mom said, “and she shares the greatest blame. But, yes, you should have known better too, Dora. I am ashamed of both of you. Let this be a lesson for you, Clara, and let it be a good one. This is what happens when women step outside of Da Hah’s place for us. You must never be teachin’ and sayin’ these matters to the men.”
    Mamm sat down suddenly on the couch. Her face was drawn up in pain.
    “But you tell Daett things,” Clara said. “I hear you all the time.”
    Whether this was true or not, Ella wanted to clamp her hand across Clara’s mouth, but the words had been spoken. She held her breath and watched her mom’s face.
    Mamm seemed lost in her own world of grief, but slowly she turned toward Clara. “I know, child. I do,” she said, her voice soft. “We all do whether we should or not. I’m just overcome at the moment. I know Ella and Dora meant no harm. I might have done so myself if my brother had been seein’ an Englisha girl. But what are we to do now? Eli is seein’ a girl of the world, and your daett must be told.”
    “I can tell him,” Clara whispered as Ella and Dora sat on each side of Mamm with their arms around her shoulders. In the silence of the living room—the familiar scene of a thousand family gatherings—they all wept together.

Eight
     
    “ A ch,” Mamm finally said, “here we sit like boblis , and the day’s work has not been done yet.”
    “I can go tell Daett,” Clara repeated her offer and looked relieved the tears had stopped.
    “No, I’d best go tell him,” Ella said, getting up from the couch. The action seemed right to her, that she—the one who had