Emily & Einstein by Linda Francis Lee Read Free Book Online Page A

distractedly at some simpleminded rubber toy Blue had left me, I was surprised when Vinny appeared one day and attempted to lure me out of the cage.
    “Time for a bath.”
    Bath? Someone, namely this fellow, was going to bathe me?
    While the idea of soaking in my deep porcelain tub back at the Dakota sounded like heaven, getting a dog bath didn’t sound like anything I would enjoy.
    “Come on, dog.”
    I deduced it to be well after midnight because Vinny had been there alone long enough to watch his favorite television show, mop haphazardly, watch his second favorite show, empty the trash cans, and take his late-night nip of cheap whiskey. Given that even as a dog I was no fool, I stayed where I was.
    “You’re taking a bath. The doc said it was time. When he shows up in the morning you’ve gotta be clean.” His less than spring-fresh coveralls carried a host of competing odors, none of them pleasant. “We can do this the easy way or the hard way. Just so ya know, I’m partial to the hard way.”
    His low chuckle made me think of a B-level actor straight out a bad episode of The Sopranos . What was he going to do? Break my leg, stuff me in a trunk, and drive me to a New Jersey landfill? What would Nurse and Vet say when I went missing? They might not care that much, but I knew Emily would.
    Amused at my analogies, and gratified that at least someone would notice if I went missing, I laughed at the thought. Unfortunately, it came out as a growl.
    “Don’t growl at me, mutt. I can hurt you without anyone knowing. I have ways.”
    He leaned close and I cringed at the wave of rotgut liquor coming out of him. Good lord, cheap whiskey, no deodorant, and a street-vendor wrap for dinner. The mix of smells was enough to make a lesser dog empty his stomach.
    I rose, backing up until my hind quarters hit the metal grating. Vinny’s eyes narrowed. The next thing I knew he reached in, dragged me from the cage, took out the kind of plastic bat you’d buy at a toy store for a child, and whacked me in the head. Other than surprise, I didn’t feel a thing. But when I finally came to, I was surprisingly clean—and somehow I had managed to give Vinny a nasty black eye.
    *   *   *
    As much as I shouldn’t admit it, I was rather proud of that black eye. It gave me something of a ruffian swagger, quite a different mien from the one I’d had as a man. As Sandy Portman, I never engaged in any sort of fisticuffs. I didn’t have to. That charm of mine, not to mention my money, went a long way toward getting me what I wanted out of life. But the morning after Emily shoved the bag of cinnamon rolls in my hands and pushed me out the door, I realized she saw me solely as a cog in a corporate machine, no different from her. A novelty, sure, but I found myself dressing down and waving my driver away. More than ever I was reluctant to admit who I was, not because I was concerned she’d suddenly want me for my money, but because I was afraid she wouldn’t want me at all.
    After finishing off the cinnamon rolls the next morning, I dialed her cell.
    “I’m serious this time, come away with me,” I said when she answered. “We’ll go to Italy or France. You name it.”
    She laughed. “I have a better idea. I’ll take you away. Meet me at my apartment in an hour.”
    “What should I bring? An overnight bag? A steamer trunk so we can run away forever?”
    “Just yourself. In casual clothes.”
    “France casual?”
    More of her laughter, though it turned out her choice of getaways wasn’t particularly funny.
    “We’re going to Coney Island?” I said. “On the subway?”
    My tone must have hinted at my lack of enthusiasm.
    “How else are we going to get there?” she asked, her tone careful.
    Right then I should have told her the truth, but better sense was no competition for self-preservation. I rationalized not telling her by promising myself that I would confess that weekend. It never occurred to me she might learn the