Everything Is Illuminated by Jonathan Safran Foer Read Free Book Online Page B

inquired. "What?" "Where's ... the ... dog ... going ... to ... be?" "I do not understand." "I'm afraid of dogs," he said. "I've had some pretty bad experiences with them." I told this to Grandfather, who was still half of himself in dream. "No one is afraid of dogs," he said. "Grandfather informs me that no one is afraid of dogs." The hero moved his shirt up to exhibit me the remains of a wound. "That's from a dog bite," he said. "What is?" "That." "What?" "This thing." "What thing?" "Here. It looks like two intersecting lines." "I don't see it." "Here," he said. "Where?" "Right here," he said, and I said, "Oh yes," although in truth I still could not witness a thing. "My mother is afraid of dogs." "So?" "So I'm afraid of dogs. I can't help it." I clutched the situation now. "Sammy Davis, Junior, Junior must roost in the front with us," I told Grandfather. "Get in the fucking car," he said, having misplaced all of the patience that he had while snoring. "The bitch and the Jew will share the back seat. It is vast enough for both of them." I did not mention how the back seat was not vast enough for even one of them. "What are we going to do?" the hero asked, afraid to become close to the car, while in the back seat Sammy Davis, Junior, Junior had made her mouth with blood from masticating her own tail.

THE BOOK OF RECURRENT DREAMS, 1791
    T HE NEWS of his good fortune reached Yankel D as the Slouchers were concluding their weekly service.
    It is most important that we remember,
the narcoleptic potato farmer Didl S said to the congregation, which was reclining on pillows around his living room. (The Sloucher congregation was a wandering one, calling home a different congregant's house each Shabbos.)
    Remember what?
the schoolteacher Tzadik P asked, expelling yellow chalk with each syllable.
    The
what, Didl said,
is not so important, but that we should remember. It is the act of remembering, the process of remembrance, the recognition of our past ... Memories are small prayers to God, if we believed in that sort of thing ... For it says somewhere something about just this, or something just like this ... I had my finger on it a few minutes ago ... I swear, it was right here. Has anyone seen
The Book of Antecedents
around? I had an early volume here just a second ago ... Crap!... Can somebody tell me where I was? Now I'm totally confused, and embarrassed, and I always screw it up when it's at my house—
    Memory,
grieving Shanda assisted, but Didl had fallen uncontrollably asleep. She woke him up and whispered,
Memory.
    â€”There we go,
he said, not missing a beat as he riffled through a stack of papers on his pulpit, which was really a chicken coop.
Memory. Memory and reproduction. And dreams, of course. What is being awake if not interpreting our dreams, or dreaming if not interpreting our wake? Circle of circles! Dreams, yes? No? Yes. Yes, it is the first Shabbos. First of the month. And it being the first Shabbos of the month, we must make our additions to
The Book of Recurrent Dreams.
Yes? Someone tell me if I'm fucking this up.
    I've had a most interesting dream for the past two weeks,
said Lilla F, descendant of the first Sloucher to drop the Great Book.
    Excellent,
Didl said, pulling Volume IV of
The Book of Recurrent Dreams
from the makeshift ark, which was really his wood-burning oven.
    As did I,
Shloim added.
Several of them.
    I, too, had a recurrent dream,
Yankel said.
    Excellent,
Didl said.
Most excellent. It won't be long before another volume is complete!
    But first,
Shanda whispered,
we must review last month's entries.
    But first,
Didl said, assuming the authority of a rabbi,
we must review last month's entries. We must go backward in order to go forward.
    But don't take too long,
Shloim said,
or I'll forget. It's amazing I've been able to remember it this long.
    He'll take exactly as long as it takes,
Lilla said.
    I'll take exactly as long as it takes,
Didl said, and blackened his hand with the ash that had