dominance and sex. Their motivation and desire to obtain this information is high, as evidenced by the fact that they are willing to pay a cost — similar in important ways to the hens bashing open heavy doors to get chipped wood. Keeping an eye on a dominant is of value as dominants pose a threat, especially one staring at you. Keeping an eye on a female’s rear end is also of value as it can signal sexual receptivity: in rhesus monkeys, as in many other monkeys and apes, the area around the vagina either swells, turns red, or both when females are ovulating. This is important information for males, guiding their desire to court and mate with willing females.
Humans also value social information, devoting many hours in a day to gossiping and people-watching, whether in magazines, tabloids, reality TV, or real life. This information showcases what we have relative to others, a difference that will be exaggerated in societies with dominance hierarchies.
People living in hierarchical societies should relish information showing that a competitor has lost resources, whereas those living in egalitarian societies should be motivated to redress the imbalance. To test this possibility, the social psychologist Joan Chiao used survey information to establish two groups of individuals, one with preferences for hierarchical societies and the other with preferences for egalitarian societies. Chiao placed individuals from these two groups into a brain scanner and showed them pictures of people experiencing pain — an experience that often triggers empathy. Two areas, both associated with the personal experience of pain and the perception of pain in others, were highly active; this is the brain’s way of representing empathy. But these areas were less active in those who preferred hierarchies than those who preferred egalitarianism. This finding, as Chiao notes, is consistent with the idea that in an egalitarian society, empathy for others’ well-being is essential. In egalitarian societies, seeing someone who has less or is being harmed by another, should motivate a desire to redress the imbalance and reduce the harm. In a dog-eat-dog hierarchical society, where dominants outcompete subordinates and inequities are part of life, concern for those at the bottom is a sign of weakness.
Chiao interpreted her results as evidence that cultural influences can shape brain activity, leading some to develop a desire for dominance and inequities, whereas others develop a desire for equality. It is possible, however, that these individuals started out life with structural differences in brain anatomy and function, and these differences led some to prefer societies that champion inequalities while others prefer those that support equality. Chiao’s work can’t distinguish between these alternatives. Nonetheless, her studies nicely show that patterns of brain activation can heighten our sensitivity to what others have, what we desire, and how some of our desires can flexibly change in response to what others have. And if the addictive model I have been pushing is more broadly applicable to all of our desires, then our desire for status can turn into an unhinged drive for power that is difficult to satisfy.
I’ll have what she’s having
One of the most famous lines in movie history was delivered by Estelle Reiner in
When Harry Met Sally,
a comedy produced by her son Rob Reiner. While Estelle is seated at a table in a delicatessen, Sally — played by Meg Ryan — fakes having an orgasm to show Harry — played by Billy Crystal — that he can’t tell the difference between fakes and the real deal. Overhearing Ryan’s performance, Estelle turns to the waiter and says “I’ll have what she’s having.” This is comparison shopping, cashing in on someone else’s subjective experience to guide our chosen experiences.
Orgasms and eating are two of the most pleasurable experiences in life, whether you live in Tokyo, Toronto, Toulouse, Tehran