Forty Candles by Virginia Nelson Read Free Book Online

repeat of the conversation playing in her head.
    “Chloe?”
    Jack. She hadn’t heard him knock. The man seemed to have a radar for when her life went to shit. Chest aching, mouth dry, cheeks crusty with dried tears, she didn’t know if she had the energy to answer him. The bed moved as his weight joined hers on the mattress. She couldn’t turn, couldn’t face him.
    “What are you doing?”
    Burying her face in her hands, she fought a fresh wave of sobs.
    “Baby…” His arms closed around her and she rolled and crumpled into the leathery man scent of him, borrowing his strength. He was familiar, safe, in the storm of unwanted emotions.
    Jack’d been around for most of her life, a friend and companion. The kid next door. Her first real boyfriend.
    “He left me.”
    The words ripped from her on a wail and he rubbed her back in soothing circles.
    “He’s a dick.” Jack sounded so flat, so emotionless. “He didn’t deserve you to start with.”
    Laughter, sounding hysterical even to her, bubbled up and caught on the next wave of sadness. “I failed, Jack. I should have guessed…I’m just not made for this kind of thing.”
    “What kind of thing? Being married to a self-centered dickhead?”
    She couldn’t laugh. She understood now that it wasn’t him. It was her. She was broken inside and she should have known Gary would see it eventually.
    Jack’s arms cradled her, protected her, and she became aware of the world around her. The sun slanted at a different angle through the window. The smell of Jack, the strength of him, soaked through her pain and she noticed his hands shook a little as he touched her.
    Jack always liked her, but she’d dumped him, fearing what he offered. Because he had plans of a future she wouldn’t ever fit into.
    Because she couldn’t imagine losing him when he saw how empty she was inside…like Gary apparently did.
    In this moment, when she already lost so much, that fear seemed sort of inconsequential. She lost her husband, why worry overmuch about losing Jack?
    Dragging her hand up his back, using her nails on him in a way she knew tripped his trigger, she rubbed her face into the hollow of his neck, breathing deep the rich smell of him.
    “God, Chloe, I feel bad for what you’re going through, but it feels good to hold you.”
    It would. He liked her. He didn’t see the ugly bits, the parts that drove Gary away.
    Wriggling closer to him, she allowed her legs to part, to pull him closer. His slight groan and the feel of him hard against her rewarded her bravery.
    “It feels good to be held, Jackie.”
    He rained kisses over her cheeks, her eyes, cupping her face in his hands. “I’m just trying to comfort you, not come onto you.”
    “Then comfort me. Make it all go away, Jackie. I don’t want to think about it anymore.” No sooner had she whispered the words that he closed his lips over hers. Electricity, vibrant and alive, arced through her, making her feel more wonderful than she remembered feeling.
    “Baby, you could tempt a saint.” He tried to pull away, give them both some breathing room to think, but it wasn’t what she wanted and she slid her fingertips under his shirt, searching for hot flesh. “And I remember the taste of you. You’re not making it easy to be a good guy, here.”
    “Then make love to me, Jack. I don’t want to think, like I said. Make it go away. I can’t deal with it today.”
    He groaned before merging their mouths, his hands racing across her body as if he starved for the feel of her. “This isn’t what I ever planned for us.”
    Like a knife, she took the blow. She pulled away, withering into herself, as he so closely echoed her own thoughts. Life wasn’t about what you planned, she learned that lesson today. “Go. Go home, Jack. Get away from me before I poison your life, too.”
    “No.”
    The decision in his voice was clear and she only had a moment before those searching hands returned, pulling her back against the hard