Hand Me Down by Melanie Thorne Read Free Book Online Page A

me,” I say and it’s like a bee sting on burned skin.
    “Your mom always talks about how smart you are,” he says, sipping his beer.
    I say, “What do you want?”
    “Just to spend time with you, Liz.” He pulls his plate closer and takes a bite of his sausage. He’s smug as he wipes mustard off his chin. “Are you ready to have a nice family meal now?”
    I take a deep breath and nod. “Good,” he says.
    Mom calls later and she sounds happy. “I’m so proud of you,” she says. “Terrance said the two of you went to lunch today to try to make peace and foster a better environment for our future as a family.”
    “Uhh.”
    “He said you had a really nice talk. That you agreed to make less of a fuss, and let us have this time to restore our relationship.” I shake my head, impressed by Terrance’s strategy. “I really appreciate it,” she says, sounding genuine. “I wanted to call and thank you for being so willing.”
    If she hadn’t chosen this monster of a man over me, I might feel bad that he’s sleeping with who knows how many skanks like Kayla. I want to crush her with the news but I know Terrance is right. She would never believe it if it came from me. “Sure,” I say, glad she can’t see the tightness in my jaw, the rigid line of my lips.
    Mom says, “I know how hard that must have been for you and it’s that kind of sacrifice that’s going to make it easier for you to come home.”
    My heart shrivels. “I really want us to come home,” I say quietly.
    “I know,” Mom says. She hesitates. “Was it…did he…” she stammers, and it’s not like her. “Did you have an okay time?” she says and there’s a hint of worry in her voice that makes me consider telling her the truth.
It was one of the worst afternoons of mylife.
She twitters her nervous laugh. “I mean, not that there’s any reason for you not to.”
    I say what she expects to hear. “It was fine.”
    Gary is the manager of the parts department at a car dealership and works until six on weeknights. He came home early once while I was watching
What’s Eating Gilbert Grape
. That was right after I’d moved in, when cheesy Lifetime specials and Kodak commercials made me cry for hours, but that scene where Gilbert and his siblings stand thigh-deep in a field of waving grass and watch their dead mother burn up with their house ripped sounds from my throat I didn’t know I could make. My face was soaked and my swollen eyes reduced my sight to slits, but I could see Gary’s face when he saw me breathing in shallow gasps, red-faced but trying to calm down, and he was ashamed.
    He didn’t say anything, but when he sat down next to me on the beige couch with his usual Jack and Coke, he handed me a glass as well. I didn’t look over at his beer gut or his round dark cheeks as I sipped my drink. The fire in my belly eased the flames in my head, and I tried to take deep breaths. When the credits rolled across Gary’s big-screen television, he leaned forward, picked up the remote from the coffee table, and cleared his throat.
    “You know, Liz,” he said and dropped his head into his hands. His gold wedding band forced the surrounding skin to puff out around his finger. His nails were dark black under the tips. “I know my brother is a fuckup,” he said, looking at the beige carpet. “I know this has got to be hard for you.” He glanced at me and I wasglad that aside from the coloring, he didn’t look like Terrance. “You don’t expect to have a flasher in the family, but…” Gary kind of laughed. He ran his black-tipped and calloused hands through his dark hair. “I just want you to know you have a home here,” he said, and I think he meant it.
    So when Mom tells me that Gary and Carol have decided to have a baby and that I am ruining their mojo—though that’s not what she says exactly—I understand why Gary didn’t tell me himself. This was supposed to be temporary.

3
    I’ve been given until January to