Handle With Care by Josephine Myles Read Free Book Online Page A

avoided his eyes. “Not really up to going out and pulling, these days,” I mumbled.
    “But you are allowed to have sex, right?”
    Ollie sounded really concerned. I looked up into his espresso-brown eyes and tried to smile as I nodded.
    “Well, that’s a—”
    “Ben! Oh, my God, are you all right?”
    Whatever Ollie had been about to say was interrupted by Zoe’s arrival.
    “I’m fine,” I told her, but she wasn’t having it.
    “You always say that when you’re having a hypo.” She turned to Ollie.
    “What’s happened? Did you find him like this?”
    Ollie took over and explained about his trip to the fridge to find my Lucozade stash, much to my relief as I really didn’t feel like being on the receiving end of one of Zoe’s “look after yourself” lectures.
    It took the two of them to help me to my feet and then get me ensconced on the sofa with my feet up on the coffee table. I noticed Ollie discreetly slip the 44
     
    DVD back into the package and place it on my telly. I should have told him not to bother—Zoe would probably want to borrow the damn thing.
    Before he left, Ollie turned to me, looking strangely ill at ease and jiggling on his feet.
    “Listen, I’d love to come round this evening and check up on you, but I’ve got a shift at the café, and I can’t really let them down.”
    Yeah, right. Now he’d seen me properly ill, he couldn’t wait to get away. “I don’t need a babysitter,” I snapped.
    “That’s not what I meant.” Bright spots appeared on Ollie’s cheeks. “Christ, you’re hard work sometimes.”
    “Well, there’s no need to put yourself out. I’m just a customer, after all.” I regretted the words as soon as they were out, but I wasn’t going to take them back. He’d seen enough of my weakness for one day.
    He shook his head at me, muttering as he left the room. I heard the front door slam.
    Zoe came through holding two cups of tea and one of my carefully rationed juice bottles.
    “Where’s he gone?” she asked. “Benji, did you go and say something stupid?”
    I tried to hide my face in the cushions. “Thought you didn’t like him.”
    Zoe huffed. “It’s not that I don’t like him. He’s just a bit young for you. At least he can keep his head in a crisis, though. Would have thought you’d be glad to have him stay for tea.”
    “He had to get back to work,” I mumbled.
    She gave me a long look but obviously decided it wasn’t worth pursuing that line of questioning when I was due a lecture about looking after myself. I strapped myself in for the ride. Zoe was right, and I knew it.
     
    I had a terrible night. Zoe’s words kept echoing round my head, and I cringed with shame every time I recalled how I’d spoken to Ollie. Poor guy must be totally confused about me and my mixed messages. Wouldn’t blame him if he didn’t want to be friends anymore. I still couldn’t swallow Zoe’s assertion that he was “well into me”, but I certainly didn’t want to lose the first real friend I’d made in the last couple of years. I wasn’t counting the ones I’d made online, as I’d told them so much bullshit, they had no idea who I really was.
    I needed to make amends in some way. I’d have to invite him round, make him coffee or something. He loved coffee, didn’t he? And at least I’d get the vicarious pleasure of smelling the stuff even if I couldn’t drink any myself. I had a bag of coffee beans in the freezer still, kept just in case Zoe ever needed a pick-me-up on her way into work. My mind made up, I managed a few hours sleep, and although I felt like hell when I eventually woke up, I did manage to pull on some new clothes, eat a bowl of muesli and get my first dialysate bag infused. I was rubbing my eyes in front of my monitor when the doorbell made me jump out of my skin.
    I was a bundle of neuroses wrapped up in designer clothing by the time I finally reached the front door. Was he only here because I’d ordered yet another porn