Have Yourself a Marine Christmas (Always a Marine) by Heather Long Read Free Book Online Page A

music and wanting to be as far away from it as you can? You don’t even have a sprig of holly in that apartment. Nothing. It’s two weeks until Christmas, Rebel, and shutting it down like this…it’s not healthy.”
    “Not feeling the urge to get caught up in the soppy, ridiculously over-commercialized sentimentality of the so-called season doesn’t make me unhealthy.” The cold, angry words were so unlike the man she’d gotten to know.
    “I didn’t deserve that.” She understood the need to lash out when someone pressed too close to an injury, as she was obviously doing in this moment, but that didn’t make it okay.
    Stopping with a sigh, Rebel scrubbed a hand over his face. “I was injured in mid-November last year.” For a long moment, she thought he wouldn’t say anything more, but then he turned and faced her. “I don’t remember much from those first surgeries or the flight out—what I do remember is the music—Christmas music. Every time I woke up—it was all I could hear.”
    Disliking seasonal music made a certain amount of sense.
    “I had a choice to make—I had to get better, I had to be able to walk again. But I couldn’t stand hearing those songs—seeing the decorations, listening to the laughter. Christmas is a myth, it’s a great myth—we sell it to kids and we make them believe. I needed to believe in something, so I believed in me. And now I’m walking again.” He gave her a tight smile. “But pranks—letters from a Santa who doesn’t exist? Empty, meaningless gestures? No. I can’t do that and get better, too. So no, I don’t really want to play make believe. Not anymore. I don’t want to decorate with holly or faux trees or lights.”
    The silence stretched out, taut and fragile. What impressed Noel wasn’t his anger, because he’d been almost calm in his rationalizing away the holiday. Empty. Exhausted. It was the way he faced her, his chin up and he didn’t hide this piece away—even though the muscle ticking in his jaw, and the stiffness of his shoulders declared he didn’t want to talk about it.
    Okay. James said if he would answer, that’s a good first step. Don’t push, give him some space, and reward the openness. I can do that . “Okay.” She said it out loud, because he needed to hear it. “I get it.” And she did, recovery took different forms in different people.
    Closing the distance between them, Noel held out her hand. The wind numbed her fingertips, but Rebel took the proverbial olive branch.
    “You’re freezing,” he said.
    “It’s a bit nippy.”
    With a tug, he nodded to his apartment building. “Can we stop taking the long way?”
    “You up for the grassy, uphill walk?” Maybe she should have started the conversation inside. No amount of clenching her jaw could stop her teeth from chattering.
    “Let’s find out.” They double-timed it up the hill, and Rebel didn’t waver once. The building cut away some of the wind, but the faint smile on his face faded as they passed his neighbors’ doors on the way to his apartment. Every single one had a wreath or lights or combination of holiday decorations. “I can’t get away from it.”
    “Yes, you can,” She pointed to his apartment and the crossed US flags hanging where the wreath would have gone. “You have your sanctuary right there.” She had to be able to do something else to help, didn’t know what yet, but she’d figure it out.
    “You’re still coming in, right?” He had his keys in one hand and held her with the other.
    “Yes, you promised me coffee.” Had he thought she would forgo the coffee date after their conversation? The split-second of relief easing the tension around his eyes suggested that yes, it had been exactly what he thought.
    Once inside, she stripped off her coat and savored the heat. Rebel went to start the coffee, and she wandered over to the window and opened the blinds—only to see one of the park paths lined with Christmas trees. That had been set