Highland Guard by Hannah Howell Read Free Book Online Page B

loss of the warmth of his touch caused her to feel a pinch of sorrow, but she clasped her hands in front of her to stop from reaching out to him. What she wanted to do was burrow into his strong arms and hide for a while. She would not, could not, give in to that weakness.
    “Aye, that makes sense. So, best we prepare as soon as can be. I suspect Nicolas needs no direction from me to heed what ye say and we are nay without funds if they are needed. I hate this and, God forgive me, I loathe Sir Adam for bringing us to this, but I will see it done.”
    Harcourt nodded. He could see how troubled she was and admired the way she was looking past her own qualms to do what needed to be done. The temptation to pull her into his arms and offer some comfort was strong, but her stiff posture told him such a gesture would not be welcome. Instead he gave her a small bow.
    “Then I shall set to it, Lady Annys.”
    Annys watched as he walked away. She was both lonely and proud. Proud of herself for being strong but finding that being strong made her loneliness sharper.
    As she made her way to the kitchens to oversee the preparations for the next meal, she finally admitted to herself that she had been lonely since the day he had ridden away from her. Anger and hurt over the way he had not taken even a moment of his time to exchange some private words before leaving had dimmed that sense of loss for a long time.
    It would be all too easy to reach out for Harcourt to ease that loneliness. Annys suspected her people would think nothing of it. There were many small reasons not to do so but the one that truly held her back was the fear of being hurt. The way he had left her without a word after the many times they had been together, the many sweet words he had whispered to her as they had made love, had cut her to the bone. Even knowing he had had no right to claim her, that she could not be with him openly, had not eased her pain. Annys did not think she could survive it a second time.
    Shaking such thoughts from her head, she went to work. Hard work had assisted her in keeping Sir Harcourt Murray out of her thoughts before, when he had walked away from her without looking back. It should be able to do so again even though he was now back within reach.

Chapter Four
    Annys sat back on her heels and idly tried to rub away the aching twinge in her lower back. Taking advantage of a rare beautiful summer day, she and Joan were carefully tending to the kitchen garden. She had forgotten just how much hard work that was. There was not one part of her that did not ache or feel very dirty.
    “It grows verra warm,” said Joan as she moved to sit next to Annys and wiped the sweat from her face with her apron. “I think I am sweating enough to water the plants. Time to leave the work for the younger lassies.”
    “I prefer to think of myself as one of those younger lassies,” murmured Annys.
    Joan laughed. “Aye, but at times it serves us weel to be older.”
    Annys smiled. “True and there are days when I can feel verra old indeed.”
    A young girl brought them each a tankard of cool cider and Annys thanked her. Since they were at the far edge of the garden, she and Joan moved back a few feet until they were beneath the shade of an old oak tree. It took only moments in the shade, sipping the cool cider, for Annys to begin to feel refreshed. She was just not certain she was refreshed enough to return to working in the garden.
    “Ye are the lady of the keep. Ye dinnae need to do this work if ye dinnae wish to,” Joan said.
    “There are times, Joan, when I think ye can see every thought inside my head.”
    “Nay, I but saw that ye were looking at the garden in the same way I was and I kenned what I was thinking. Decided ye must be feeling the same.”
    “I should nay feel so guilty for wanting to quit it. I have worked here for most of the morning.”
    “Aye, ye ne’er hesitate to get your hands dirty. We all ken it and ye should ne’er feel