In a Latitude of Temperance (The Adventures of Ichabod Temperance Book 5) by Ichabod Temperance Read Free Book Online Page B

believe that all arrangements have been made and our business concluded here. I suggest we hurry back to the ‘Stoker’ as we only have a few more hours of the night’s freedom-granting darkness in which to operate this evening.”
    “Ha, ha! Yes! Welcome, my esteemed colleague Count Onyx’Ula! With the addition of yourself and Pol Steele, I count two more to our party, yes! One, two, three, four, five, six, seven! Seven members do I count of this little group, yes! My most favourite number! My luckiest, too! Ha, ha!”
    “Heh,heh,heh, h-h-h-let’s be on our way, henh...”
    “Yoodally, yoodally, yoo, hoo! Excuse me, Mr. Steele? I am afraid we still have just a weeee bit of a transaction to perform before you depart the gracious diggs of our humble hotel.” The dysc clerk of the Hotel GnuTerry pronounces this as he smiles at our Scottish mate. “May I have a word, sir?”
    The stout little Scotsman turns an open and affable face back to the bearded clerk, “Eh, huh-whouot’s this abouots then?”
    “Wel-l-l-ll, It seems that your rooms were generously paid for up front and in full by Mr. WrenneFeyldde & Co. for which the ‘Hotel GnuTerry’ is most grateful and appreciative. That is, until last night’s stay. I am afraid that we will have to ask you to compensate the hotel for this extra amount of time you have since spent in our care.”
    The tiniest trace of a cloud passes over the happy features of the tweed bound scientist before his cheerfulness reapplies itself.
    “Oh, ho, you’re jouost havin’ me ouon a bit, are ye’ naughtte? Ha, ha, my clerksy pal o’mine, I thinks ye’ be taeasin’ me to try and get a rise o’ me anger. Ho, ho, you fouonny mahn, ye’ knows I beh checked oout well by the eleven o’ clock prescribed houor.”
    “Wel-l-l-ll, this hotel has very strict policies, you see. You were checked out by the specified time, and though you did make up the bed and actually left your room much cleaner than you found it, which was very kind but completely unnecessary, the problem lies in the fact that you have waited in our lobby this entire day awaiting your associates. As the time is now five minutes past midnight, it seems you have stayed on for an additional thirteen plus hours in our care.”
    “Boot I’ve beaeen sitting right here in your lobby!”
    “We-l-l-ll, the lobby is most certainly a part of our hotel, is it not?”
    “You’ve been paid for three nights’ stay, ye’ chintzee briarknaughtte! Ye’ cannae charge me for bloouody sitting in ye’ darnable larby awaiting mae associates!”
    “I am so sorry, Mr. Steele, but our policy is clear. This sort of thing could lead to even more flagrant transgressions of our estate.”
    “Did ye’ jouost calls mae a traunsgressor?”
    “Perhaps I misspoke. No, you see, we must be ever wary of allowing our premises to be open to acts of vagrancy.”
    “Oh! I’m a vagrant now am I! That’s eet! I’ve stoouod ahlle I can stahnds ande I cahn’t stahnds nae moore! Awe-RAWRRRR!!!”
    “Woah! Grab a leg, Senor Diego Ignatio Ricardio MontelKahn!”
    “Si, Temperanci! Steele is going over the edge of the dysc. I have seen that look in the face of man before. This is the passion of Death. He means to end this hair-splitting clerk.”
    “C’mon, Mr. Steele, please don’t kill this man. We’ll all chip in and pay the bill. What do ya say, pard’?”
    “Nae! Arrrgh! Lemme jouost strangle him a leetle beet! Please!”
    “Senor Steele, this is most unbecoming behavior for a scientist of our caliber. Please to think of your position, sir.”
    “Mae poosition be’s ahtoop this flinty heeel as I cuts oout his shriveled oop prooone o’ ah hear-r-r-rt! Arrgh! Meess Ploomtartt! You’re ah nice gel. Be ah loove an’ fetch me a nice sharp knife m’dearie.”
    “That might not be the most prudent course, Mr. Steele.”
    “Heh,heh, Herr Steele! Please to calm yourself! The estate vill compensate you for any expenses incurred.