In Darkness Lost by Ariel Paiement Read Free Book Online Page B
Authors: Ariel Paiement
you been pushing down emotions about me?”
“Ever since I met you,” I whispered.
She looked up at me quickly, eyes widening.
I laughed softly at her expression. “What? It’s true! The moment I laid eyes on you and saw you laughing at something your mother said, I was enamored. I only just admitted how deeply I love you, though.”
She blushed.
I let go of her, looking into her glittering eyes. “Dairdra?”
“What?”
“We can’t ever be married, so nothing will ever come of our love for each other. You know that, right?”
“But you’re Court Mage, and you’re the most powerful mage we have. Why, in my family lines alone, there has been a history of the Court Mages and the royalty intermarrying. Crypt, there’s no reason why we couldn’t be married if we wished.”
I felt my heart pounding in my chest. “Dairdra… I…”
I couldn’t tell her about the King of Cyril and my own willingness to betray her for my sister’s sake. Not only that, I wasn’t sure I was even willing anymore.
“What?”
She saw the tortured look in my eyes. She laid her hands over mine.
“Crypt, what’s wrong? What aren’t you telling me?”
“Nothing. It’s just that… Well, family relations are rather strained right now. I’m worried about my sister is all, and she’s not exactly going to talk to me.”
Dairdra nodded. “You two aren’t on good terms?”
“Well, not exactly… It’s just that her loyalties don’t lie where mine do, and we aren’t able to compromise on it.”
“Oh. I see.”
She didn’t, though. She believed what I’d told her, but the problem was, I’d lied about it all. Well, except the part about my sister being unable talk to me and about her loyalties. She was bound to Cyril, and she was incapable of contacting me while at war with my country. She knew as well as I did that it was a treasonous act to have dealings with someone from the enemy country.
Dairdra curled tighter against me. “That doesn’t mean anything to our marriage, Crypt.”
I started. “What? I mean… We’re at war, Dairdra. We shouldn’t get married now.”
She rolled her eyes in the dark. “And if I don’t survive it? Or what if you…” Her voice caught.
I couldn’t stand talking about it. I kissed her hard to stop the words. She kissed me back for a moment, and then pulled away, breathless.
“What if you did… well… Just, what if?”
I put a finger to her lips. “Please… I don’t want to talk about it. I’ll do all I can to see us both out of this alive.”
And it was true. I would. In the end, though, if it meant dying so that she would live, I would do it. She meant as much to me as my sister, and if by betraying her country I could let her live, I would do it.
She wrapped her arms around my neck, and I twined mine around her waist. I noticed the pale look to her face, and it occurred to me once more that it was the middle of winter, and it was cold.
“We should go inside. It’s freezing out here.” I grimaced.
“I told you that at the beginning, Crypt.” She buried her face in my neck, breathing out with a huff.
“Yeah, well, now we’re both noticing.” I laughed.
She got up, and I opened the door for her. When we were both inside, we sat down on the sofa inside.
“Much better. Not so cold in here.” I murmured.
“Agreed. At least you had a cloak, but you were the only thing keeping me warm!”
I laughed. We sat quietly together. She was curled against me, head resting on my shoulder, my arms around her waist. I wished that we could stay that way forever.
Suddenly she broke the silence. “I still think we could be married if we wanted. Why not soon before the war really starts? Then we can have a little time together before it ends. If either of us died… Well, you know. At least we’d have had a little time.”
I shook my head. “I can’t.”
She gave me a strange look. “Why not?”
I sighed softly. “I can’t explain it. Please just trust
“Ever since I met you,” I whispered.
She looked up at me quickly, eyes widening.
I laughed softly at her expression. “What? It’s true! The moment I laid eyes on you and saw you laughing at something your mother said, I was enamored. I only just admitted how deeply I love you, though.”
She blushed.
I let go of her, looking into her glittering eyes. “Dairdra?”
“What?”
“We can’t ever be married, so nothing will ever come of our love for each other. You know that, right?”
“But you’re Court Mage, and you’re the most powerful mage we have. Why, in my family lines alone, there has been a history of the Court Mages and the royalty intermarrying. Crypt, there’s no reason why we couldn’t be married if we wished.”
I felt my heart pounding in my chest. “Dairdra… I…”
I couldn’t tell her about the King of Cyril and my own willingness to betray her for my sister’s sake. Not only that, I wasn’t sure I was even willing anymore.
“What?”
She saw the tortured look in my eyes. She laid her hands over mine.
“Crypt, what’s wrong? What aren’t you telling me?”
“Nothing. It’s just that… Well, family relations are rather strained right now. I’m worried about my sister is all, and she’s not exactly going to talk to me.”
Dairdra nodded. “You two aren’t on good terms?”
“Well, not exactly… It’s just that her loyalties don’t lie where mine do, and we aren’t able to compromise on it.”
“Oh. I see.”
She didn’t, though. She believed what I’d told her, but the problem was, I’d lied about it all. Well, except the part about my sister being unable talk to me and about her loyalties. She was bound to Cyril, and she was incapable of contacting me while at war with my country. She knew as well as I did that it was a treasonous act to have dealings with someone from the enemy country.
Dairdra curled tighter against me. “That doesn’t mean anything to our marriage, Crypt.”
I started. “What? I mean… We’re at war, Dairdra. We shouldn’t get married now.”
She rolled her eyes in the dark. “And if I don’t survive it? Or what if you…” Her voice caught.
I couldn’t stand talking about it. I kissed her hard to stop the words. She kissed me back for a moment, and then pulled away, breathless.
“What if you did… well… Just, what if?”
I put a finger to her lips. “Please… I don’t want to talk about it. I’ll do all I can to see us both out of this alive.”
And it was true. I would. In the end, though, if it meant dying so that she would live, I would do it. She meant as much to me as my sister, and if by betraying her country I could let her live, I would do it.
She wrapped her arms around my neck, and I twined mine around her waist. I noticed the pale look to her face, and it occurred to me once more that it was the middle of winter, and it was cold.
“We should go inside. It’s freezing out here.” I grimaced.
“I told you that at the beginning, Crypt.” She buried her face in my neck, breathing out with a huff.
“Yeah, well, now we’re both noticing.” I laughed.
She got up, and I opened the door for her. When we were both inside, we sat down on the sofa inside.
“Much better. Not so cold in here.” I murmured.
“Agreed. At least you had a cloak, but you were the only thing keeping me warm!”
I laughed. We sat quietly together. She was curled against me, head resting on my shoulder, my arms around her waist. I wished that we could stay that way forever.
Suddenly she broke the silence. “I still think we could be married if we wanted. Why not soon before the war really starts? Then we can have a little time together before it ends. If either of us died… Well, you know. At least we’d have had a little time.”
I shook my head. “I can’t.”
She gave me a strange look. “Why not?”
I sighed softly. “I can’t explain it. Please just trust