In Honor
around a campfire drinking with strangers. And Rusty. From the moment I’d found out about Finn, nothing felt real. This didn’t either, which made me wonder if that’s how it would be from here on out—if I’d always feel so lost. But Finn’s letter had given me something to hold on to in the midst of it all, and I wasn’t about to let go now.
    Since Rusty had told Wyatt I was his friend’s little sister, the next logical question would be to ask where my brother was, so I steered us away from that one quick. “How ’bout y’all? What are you here for?” Nobody else seemed to notice the change in my tone of voice, but Rusty’s eyes flicked over to me, and I wondered what he thought of my not mentioning Finn. It felt wrong to me, but I didn’t want to hear it. Especially from him.
    Wyatt laughed like I’d said something funny, and Sam chuckled before he answered. “We’re here for the scuba diving, of course.”
    I didn’t know if he was kidding, and my expression must’ve said so, because Wyatt turned to me, once again mock serious. “You think he’s joking. He’s not. Corrie here dragged us all the way down here to scuba dive in the middle of the desert. We live in California , for cryin’ out loud. At the beach.”
    Corrie nodded like she’d been hearing it all the way from California, then smiled good naturedly. “Yes, but we don’t have a blue hole in California that you can see the stars from the bottom of, through eighty feet of water.” She shrugged. “Besides. It’s an adventure, and you guys are always talking about how you need to have more of those.” She turned to me. “I read about it in a magazine. It’s called a cenote, which is like an underground cave but filled with water. There’s a spring at the bottom of it that keeps it filled with the clearest water you’ve ever seen. And it’s warm all year round.”
    Sam leaned over and patted her leg. “So her plan is for us to get up while it’s still dark, dive down so we can see the stars, then watch the sun come up. From the bottom of the Blue Hole.”
    Rusty raised his eyebrows, impressed. “Nice.”
    I didn’t say anything, but I flashed on a line from Finn’s letter: Watch the stars disappear , and I looked up at the sky, almost waiting for a reaction.
    Corrie gave a nod, finished off her beer, and stood. “Anyone want another?” I’d barely gotten halfway through mine, but the boys raised their hands, so she went to the cooler and returned with another dripping round.
    Wyatt laid his hand on the arm of my chair. “So,” he said, bringing me back to the moment. “You should dive with us.”
    “Did you miss the part where I’m from Texas? We don’t scuba dive there.”
    “Know how to swim?”
    “Yes.”
    Wyatt furrowed his brow, like he was thinking. Then the idea came to him. “I could breathe for you.”
    I briefly pictured us locked together beneath the water. “Like mouth to mouth ?” He had to be joking.
    He laughed and raised an eyebrow. “I could do that, too, if you want, but no. What I meant was, we could put an extra hose on my tank that you could breathe from, give you a weight belt, and have you dive with me so you can watch the sun rise.”
    It sounded amazing and beautiful and scary all at the same time and was exactly the type of thing Finn would have done without hesitation. Would have convinced me to do too. I glanced across the fire at Rusty, who was watching me with a smirk that made me wonder how many beers he’d had. He didn’t say anything, but he didn’t look away either.
    Corrie bumped my shoulder. “You should, Honor. It’ll be gorgeous. When else are you gonna get a chance like this? And it’s not complicated. I can walk you through it, but basically you just have to relax and breathe.” She smiled with the warmth of a good friend, and out of nowhere I missed Lilah. If I’d opened the letter earlier, she’d be the one next to me in the passenger seat. We’d listen to Kyra

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