Jasper John Dooley, NOT in Love by Caroline Adderson, Ben Clanton Read Free Book Online Page A

at the kitchen sink stirring water into the jam, Dad used a wet cloth to wipe the jam out of Jasper’s hair. He went to put the cloth in the laundry hamper. When he came back, Jasper was sitting at the table pouring out cereal for himself.
    â€œI thought you were having toast,” Dad said.
    â€œThe jam was too watery.”
    â€œYou seem funny this morning, Jasper,” Dad said. He put a hand on Jasper’s forehead. “Uh-oh. It’s not what I think it is, is it?”
    Jasper nodded.
    Girl-itis!
    At school, Ms. Tosh noticed right away that Jasper had got new glasses. She didn’t notice that Paul C. didn’t have glasses anymore.
    â€œI still can’t see very well,” Jasper told her. “I need to move closer to the board.”
    â€œGo to the seat where you would see best, Jasper,” Ms. Tosh said.
    Jasper didn’t need to pretend he was having trouble seeing. He had to wave his arms in front of himself as he walked so he wouldn’t crash into anything. How could Paul C. be so good at math when everything was so blurry?
    Jasper stopped at Margo and Bernadette’s table. He looked over the top of the glasses to make sure it was the right place. “I need to sit here, behind Isabel,” he told Ms. Tosh.
    Margo and Jasper switched places. As soon as Jasper was seated behind Isabel, he squinted at the back of her head through Paul C.’s glasses. Paul C.’s glasses were junk! Jasper couldn’t even see Isabel’s pigtails!
    He slid the glasses down and looked at Isabel over the top of them.
    Isabel didn’t have pigtails. Her hair barely reached her shoulders. Dipping her hair was going to be harder than he thought.
    Jasper decided to skip ahead to the next part of the plan. He tapped Isabel’s shoulder. When she turned around, Jasper pushed the frames of Paul C.’s glasses into his smiling cheeks so that his eyes stretched down.
    Instead of screaming, Isabel laughed. “Jasper John, I’m so happy you’re sitting behind me now. Did you notice? The cat is almost gone?” She pointed to the ghost of the connect-the-dots cat on her forehead. The tail had completely vanished.
    â€œI took eleven baths on the weekend,” she said.
    â€œMeet me in the bushes at recess,” Jasper whispered, lifting the glasses frames.
    â€œOkay. Can we get married then?”
    â€œMaybe,” Jasper said. “But don’t bring any other girls with you.”
    â€œIsabel and Jasper?” Ms. Tosh said. “Please stop whispering.”

    At recess, Jasper waited behind the bushes at the back of the schoolyard where the playground monitor hardly ever went. Ori, Leon and Paul C. were crouched on the other side waiting for Isabel, too.
    She came alone. “Here you are, Jasper John!” She sounded so happy to see him. But she wouldn’t be happy for long.
    â€œLet’s get married!” she said.
    â€œFirst, I have to do something,” Jasper said.
    â€œWhat?” Isabel asked. “What? What? What?”
    Jasper blew two raspberries, which was the signal for the other boys to jump out from behind the bushes with the jam and grab hold of Isabel. She shrieked in surprise.
    â€œWhat are we going to do now?” she asked in an unterrified voice.
    â€œI’m going to dip your hair in jam!” Jasper shouted. He laughed an evil laugh — “Ha ha ha ha!” — as he came toward her, unscrewing the lid.
    Isabel tilted her head so it would be easier for Jasper to get her hair in the jar. Jasper circled her, cackling and dipping. Isabel cackled, too. He dipped the sides and the back. Her bangs were too short to dip. When he finished dipping, he stepped back to look at Isabel. Runny jam dripped off the ends of her hair. Her shoulders were soaked with it.
    Isabel ripped her arms free from Ori and Paul C.’s grip. She snatched the jar.
    â€œHa ha ha ha!” she said, dumping the jam over