Joy Comes in the Morning by Ashea S. Goldson Read Free Book Online Page B

because the pay will be much better, but I don’t want to be a public relations liaison.” I stood up and walked into the kitchen.
    Taylor followed. “What’s your problem?” Taylor sucked her teeth. “At least you’ve got a job.”
    â€œI’d have to take more classes and travel a lot, and I’m not sure I want to do this.”
    â€œYou’re not still on that little teacher thing, are you?”
    I didn’t answer. “I’m not interested in public relations.”
    â€œThen turn down the job. It’s your life. Ain’t nobody stopping you.”
    â€œYou’re right. It’s my life, and I’m messing it up.” I tried to contain myself, but before I knew it, a tear had run down my cheek.
    All of a sudden Taylor stood up and looked into my eyes. “That’s not it at all, is it?”
    â€œWhat are you talking about?”
    â€œIt’s not the job you’re worrying about.” Taylor pointed her long fingernail at me. “It’s the marriage.”
    I looked down at the floor and didn’t say a word.
    â€œI knew it. You ain’t happy, and that’s not like you; not when you’re about to be Mrs. Joshua Bennings. So what is it? I know his family is not the easiest to deal with, but still . . .”
    This was true. Joshua’s family hadn’t been the most welcoming. Oh sure, they were cordial at church functions and the occasional dinner at their huge Long Island home, but I’d never felt their genuine approval since Joshua and I had become an item. In fact, they had, a couple of times, tried to set Joshua up with more suitable women from their church; all daughters of well known pastors. Each time, Joshua had politely rebuked them, and assured me that I had his heart. Still I always wondered if at the back of his mind, he, too, felt I was beneath him. My father was no well known anything; just a common, retired sanitation worker. My mother, God rest her soul, was a first generation school teacher in the public school system. Nothing to be ashamed of, but nothing to compare to Joshua’s family either.Joshua’s father was not only a pastor, but he was also a third generation judge. His mother was not only a first lady, but she was also a Congresswoman. Together, they were nothing to be scoffed at, and they were united in their mission to protect their only son.
    â€œNo, it’s not his parents,” I said.
    â€œGood, ’cause I don’t like them anyway.” Taylor stretched her gum out on her tongue, and then rolled it back into her mouth.
    â€œYou don’t like anybody.”
    â€œWhatever.”
    â€œIt’s just that . . .” I stood up and began pacing the worn carpet.
    â€œWhat is it?”
    I looked into Taylor’s eyes. “I’ve started having those dreams again.”

Chapter Eight
    The kitchen was nothing elaborate, just a bright yellow color we’d painted it a few years back and a simple square table with vinyl chairs. But just like during our childhood, it was our favorite meeting place. Mom was always in there cooking something good for us to eat.
    â€œNot those same dreams you had back then?” Taylor put her hands on her hips and squinted her eyes.
    â€œYes, those.”
    I reached into the cabinet and opened a box of doughnuts. Whenever I was nervous, I liked to eat.
    â€œBut that was so long ago, Alex,” Taylor said.
    â€œDon’t you think I know that? Do you think I’m having them on purpose or something? Like I planned for my life to become this big mess?”
    â€œWell, why now?”
    â€œIt all started up again when Joshua and I started going out together. I mean he started talking about marriage and children, me being a mother to his daughter, how he wants a big family, and I guess it has all been bothering me.”
    â€œYou guess?”
    â€œIt has been building up slowly, getting worse as the weeks go