the past nine months! Not to mention, I just found out that Rebecca’s not even keeping the baby— did you know that? And here we have Derek stepping up, thinking he’s going to raise the baby all by himself. What the hell does Derek know about raising a kid? The last person he looked after ended up in jail for attempted murder! Is that really the kind of influence that kid needs? And—don’t—get—me—started— on—Charlie! What is the deal with him lately? I swear he’s out to get Luke, and I don’t know why. I feel like they’re always at each other’s throats about something . Luke tried to tell me last night, but I didn’t give him a chance because Rebecca went into labor and all I could think about was getting to the hospital to be with my best friend, and—”
“Is someone paying you by the word today?” Bruno asked. “Take a breath, Julie. Start over. Slow down.”
I closed my eyes and dropped my forehead flat against the table.
“I’m going to break his heart, Bruno,” muffled as my words were, I knew he’d heard every one. “If I leave, Charlie’s never going to forgive me.”
I felt the weight of another body slide into the booth next to me, and Bruno’s strong arm fell across my shoulders. “Have you tried talking to him? Your uncle’s not an unreasonable man. You talk, he’ll listen.”
“Ha, maybe that’s true for everyone else, but Charlie’s never been so reasonable when it comes to talking about stuff like that,” I finally lifted my head. I turned to look at Bruno’s dark eyes and then felt my own welling with tears. “I didn’t think he had any reservations about my future with Luke. I mean, he knows how much I love him, and he knows that we’re eventually going to move forward. He gave Luke his blessing last year. Bruno, he’s had plenty of time to brace himself for this.”
“You can never truly brace yourself for some things,” Bruno said. “He’s gotten so used to having both you and Matt around.”
“But we can’t stay there forever,” I said. “Doesn’t he understand that? Who knows what Matt’s up to? I don’t. He could up and leave again any day. But it can’t fall on my shoulders to make sure that Charlie doesn’t end up alone. It can’t, right? How would that be fair?”
“Sometimes it’s not fair, Julie,” he shook his head, “but Charlie’s a strong man. If you really want to leave, you need to be honest with him. Tell him you’re ready to break out on your own, and he’ll respect you for your honesty.”
I doubted that.
Bruno didn’t know how short my leash was with Charlie.
We sat silently for a few long minutes. I didn’t know what was going through Bruno’s mind, but I imagined he was trying to figure out why I hadn’t yet jumped off a bridge. Too many frustrations, too many unknowns, too much stress…
Sometimes I wondered if it was just easier to bolt and leave Oakland. I had enough problems of my own. I didn’t need everybody else’s. I’d been so occupied with thoughts of my friends and family that I hadn’t even taken a spare moment to think about everything that had happened with Luke… So, when things got really, really hard, all I could think about was just running away. Spending a lifetime alone had to be easier than spending a lifetime surrounded by constant frustration, right?
“Hey Bruno,” I turned to look at him, “can I ask you something personal?”
“Always.”
“Why didn’t you ever get married? Have children? Do the family thing?”
Okay. So I didn’t know for sure whether any of that was true. I’d never asked about his history. Maybe he was married at one point. Maybe he had a million grown children somewhere out there. But he’d never mentioned anything, so I’d always assumed he’d been a lifelong bachelor.
I couldn’t help but wonder, was it easier being alone? Bruno would have the answer.
“I never thought I’d be any good at it,” he answered honestly. “I never