Kiss by Jill Mansell Read Free Book Online Page A

immaculate guest room was unrecognizable.
     
    Despite his long hair and gold earring, Jake had seemed remarkably normal; nevertheless, Gina was glad when he and Rachel finally made a move. He might be a lecturer in history at one of London’s largest polytechnics, but she couldn’t help wondering what the neighbours would be saying about his terrible van. And now that they were leaving, she could do likewise and retire to the sanctuary of her own room. To sit in peace and think about what Andrew might be doing, thinking and saying at this moment . . .
     
    ‘Don’t go,’ Izzy urged, rolling on to her side and stretching out for the half-empty bottle of wine. ‘Sod it, can’t reach. Kat, do the honours will you, darling? Fill Gina’s glass to the brim. Gina, don’t look so nervous! Come on now, relax.’
     
    Relaxing didn’t come easily to Gina, particularly when she was instructed to do so. Her legs were knotted together and she didn’t know what to do with her hands. Glancing at her watch, she said, ‘I really should be—’
     
    ‘No, you shouldn’t,’ said Katerina unexpectedly. Handing Gina her drink, she added, ‘You’re looking a lot better than you were when I last saw you, but you’re still twitchy. Why don’t you tell Mum what’s been happening with your ex-husband? She’s awfully good at cheering people up.’
     
    Katerina still hadn’t forgiven Gina for her selfishness the previous week, but she was also slightly ashamed of her own behaviour that day. This was her way of making amends.
     
    ‘Of course I am, I’m brilliant,’ said Izzy, her dark eyes shining. ‘Tell me all about it, every detail. It’s so unfair, isn’t it, that men should be such pigs. Why on earth do we still fall in love with them?’
     
     
    ‘. . . he was my whole world,’ Gina whispered fifteen minutes later. Her wineglass, unaccountably, was empty. Her feet were tucked up beneath her. ‘When we were first married I thought we’d have a family, but Andrew told me that we didn’t need children to be happy because we had each other. After that, every time I mentioned it he just said he didn’t want children . . . they were too expensive or too time-consuming or he needed to be able to concentrate on his career . . . and if I got upset he’d buy me a nice necklace or take me away on holiday . . . I wanted a baby so much , but he always managed to convince me he was right. And now,’ she concluded hopelessly, ‘he’s got some woman pregnant and he’s changed his mind. So I’m left on my own without a husband or a family and it’s too late for me to do anything about it. I’m too old to have children now . . . I haven’t got anything . . . it’s all been wasted . . .’
     
    Izzy, who had been listening intently, now looked perplexed. ‘I’m sorry,’ she said, eyebrows furrowed, ‘but I’m not with you. He’s been a bit of a shit, I’ll grant you that, but why exactly has your marriage been a waste?’
     
    ‘Because now I don’t have a husband or a child,’ sniffed Gina with a trace of irritation. ‘If he’d told me ten years ago that he was going to leave me eventually, I could have cut my losses and married someone else who did want a family.’
     
    Izzy’s frown deepened. ‘But you’re only thirty-six.’
     
    ‘Exactly! How long is it going to be before I even feel like looking for another man? How long is it going to be before I find someone I want to marry? It’s just not fair,’ Gina sniffed, tears glittering in her eyes. ‘By then it’ll be too late, I’ll be too old.’
     
    ‘This is crazy,’ Izzy burst out, jack-knifing into a sitting position and spilling half her wine into her lap. ‘If you want a baby that badly, you can have one. Nobody’s going to stop you!’
     
    Gina wondered for a moment what it must be like to be Izzy, to live so carelessly and with such total disregard for the conventions which had dominated her own life.
     
    But it was too great a