Learning to Breathe Again by Kelli Heneghan Read Free Book Online Page B

the small scars on her own leg as she again looked
towards him, seeing his eyes now open and looking right at her.
    “ Go ahead and ask, I don’t
mind,” he invited.
    “ I’m sorry…I didn’t mean to
be rude.”
    “ I’d keep my shirt on if I
didn’t want them to ever be seen,” his hand went to the marks that
crisscrossed his ribs and upper abs on his left side. Her eyes
followed the motion. He watched as she opened and closed her mouth
a couple of times, as if to ask him, but she didn’t voice her
thoughts out loud.

    He grew frustrated with the silence and
decided to just tell her, save her the trouble of figuring out how
to ask. “I was in the Army, in Afghanistan. My transport hit an
IED.” He dropped his head back, staring up at the glass ceiling.
“My leg is worse. One of the doctors told me I was lucky I got to
keep it. At the time, I just wanted to die. Most of these were just
from shrapnel. They required stitches but they weren’t
serious.”
    He closed his eyes against the wave of
emotion that churned in his stomach. It had been years since he’d
talked about this to anyone outside of his family. But if he was
going to ask her to spill her secrets, he had to be willing to
share his. He cleared his throat as he realized he was the one
being silent now.
    “ The pain was pretty fu—uh,
fricking intense,” he gave her a lopsided smile to apologize for
his near slip. “My injuries wound up getting me an honorable
discharge from the Army. I found a rehab center in California I
liked. It was pretty close to where Nicole lived at the time. She
stuck by me for most of my rehab, even when I was cussing her out
and telling her to go away. Which is more than I can say for the
lady who was supposed to be the love of my life.” For a brief
moment, he allowed the old bitterness to take hold and rear its
ugly head. He knew he should have grabbed a drink tonight before
getting into the hot tub.
    “ Rehab took about 9 months
and then it was time to move back to Texas. I got into law school
in Austin, graduated and opened my practice.” He watched the
blinking lights of a plane as it flew across the sky. “That’s my
story.”
    “ Some story.” Her eyes
traveled across his chest. “How long were in
Afghanistan?”
    “ Sixteen months. I was
injured eight weeks before we were due to be rotated out.” He
rolled his shoulders before sliding down into the water, getting
the jets to hit him further up his back.
    “ And the others?” She asked,
her voice so quiet he almost didn’t hear it above the
jets.
    He closed his eyes, his gut really churning
now. God, the others. He could still hear the screams in his head
sometimes. “Three of us survived the IED’s blast. I’m the only one
who made it home.” He took a chance and allowed himself to look at
her. He was expecting to see her face filled with disgust, or
revulsion, or something. Instead, all he saw was compassion.
    “ We did some USO stuff when
we were in England. The injured, they’re happy to have anybody
visit them,” she told him. “It makes you appreciate life, when you
hear the stories of what our troops have to do, and go through,
every single day. You don’t need to feel guilty that you survived,
Jack. Just remember to live for your buddies.”
    He swallowed hard and nodded, not trusting
himself to speak. How could this woman know what made it so hard to
reveal those dark days to others? Survivor’s guilt, that’s what the
therapist had called it. He was the only one on that transport to
survive. Not wanting to dwell on those thoughts right now, he
shoved them away. His view strayed up to the ceiling again and this
time, hers followed. He heard her gasp.
    “ Oh, wow. I didn’t
realize…The whole ceiling is glass!”
    “ Yup.” He latched onto the
opening to change the topic. “I wanted to be able to use the pool
year round, but I like to see the sky. “This was one of those
things that drove the builder nuts.” They both had