Let Us Eat Cake by Destiny Moon Read Free Book Online Page B

kind of neon sign that no one else saw? “I didn’t know it was obvious.”
    “It probably isn’t. I’m just attuned,” he said. He lingered in the moment as though there was much more he wanted to say. His eyes fixed on the painting on the wall behind me. “It’s a big deal to discover this side of yourself.”
    “Yeah.” I nodded. “But it felt right when you said it. All week long I’ve been walking around wondering what happened last time I was over. The sparks were just flying.”
    “I’m glad you felt that way too. We owe it to each other and to ourselves to figure out what it is.”
    “I thought about you a lot this week.”
    He smiled. It was clear that he was flattered. Then he got a mischievous look. “Were you turned on?”
    I nodded.
    “Tell me more,” he commanded.
    I looked down. How could I? I could barely think some of those thoughts, let alone talk about them. “I’m shy.”
    “You have to trust me. That’s the only way this is going to work.”
    “But…”
    “Rachel,” he said in a demanding tone. “Everything we do together is based on trust. That’s what this type of dynamic is about. When you’re inexperienced, it’s easy to think that it’s about this or that thing—a whip or a paddle—but it’s not about the accessories. It’s all about the connection.”
    I thought about that. “I did find the swing kind of distracting.”
    “Let’s not start there,” he said. “In fact, forget about that room. Let’s start up here.” He pointed to his temple then to mine. It was a gesture to suggest that our minds were connected by an invisible thread. Maybe they were, because he did have the power to put me at ease.
    I didn’t know what to say.
    “Do you trust me?” he asked.
    “Yes,” I said. “I think so. But I’m not sure why.”
    I had been reluctant to trust anyone, especially a guy I was attracted to. It had resulted in too much misery and I had promised myself to be smarter. But in that moment, I realized that somehow Jeff had presented himself as someone solid and sound.
    “Have I given you any reason not to?”
    “No.” In fact, he was everything I had stopped believing in.
    “Well, then…” He didn’t need to finish the sentence. He was like a lawyer making the final statement of a highly persuasive and self-evident case.
    “Tell me what you saw the last time. What made you think that I was submissive?” Then, almost self-consciously, I blurted, “Because I’ve spent most of my life trying to pretend I’m not.”
    “I could tell from the way you carried yourself. You’re used to being in control.”
    There it was. The nugget of truth I could not deny. As the oldest child in a pretty messed up family, I learned to parent my younger siblings from an age that most people call childhood. I was always the responsible one, cleaning up the crap my parents dished out by being drunk or passed out or unemployed or whatever.
    “I have had a lot of responsibility. It’s true,” I said.
    “Sometimes it’s nice to not be in charge.”
    He stretched his arm out far enough to semi-cradle me. Then, with gentle strokes, he massaged the side of my shoulder with his strong fingers.
    “That feels good.”
    “I want you to give in to your yearning for pleasure.”
    “Oh,” I said quietly, as I turned to give him more access to the back of my neck and the tops of my shoulders. “Oh…”
    I moaned as he kneaded me even more.
    “That’s it,” he said gently. “Don’t resist me.”
    “I won’t,” I said.
    “That’s a good girl.”
    Before long, I had presented my back to him completely. I wanted nothing more than to feel his strength infuse me. Was this what it was like to be submissive? Why had I pictured something much kinkier?
    “Isn’t that better?” he asked.
    “Yeah.” I relaxed. The tension subsided. I even felt a little silly for having been so pent-up with frustration that I had almost left. Now, with his hands all over my upper back,