Look How You Turned Out by Diane Munier Read Free Book Online Page A

get it. "Yeah. But you hear me? I don't want that nonsense. I see Jessica. Yes. But I can still live my life. I'm not apologizing for it."
    "Okay," I say like I'd say 'chill out,' because he needs to. I'm not the bitch busting his balls. Well, not overtly. But I want more. I want more. "So…I'm not asking you to…apologize."
    "I didn't say you were," he says grabbing a can of pumpkin and not making a whole lot of sense. "Where does this go?"
    I point to the cabinet, and he opens it and starts to shove the pumpkin in.
    "No, no," I say upon seeing the disorganized state of things there too. I can only imagine the frig. I go to the cabinet and start my crazy. He's right there. Like right, right there.
    "Up here, vegetables," I'm saying by way of explanation as I set the dozen cans of broccoli and cheese soup, Dad's favorite, on the counter and start to put the green beans up there. "This stuff probably gave him Parkinson's," I say.
    I have yet to have a chance to speak to Dad about his health, and it's there, and we're quiet for a minute, and Marcus starts to help me, pulling canned vegetables out and wisely setting them on the counter in groups. He bumps my shoulder and mutters sorry, then bumps it again playfully. He's almost smiling.
    "Sorry, I called her Sauroman," I say, always having something I can fake-apologize for to garner his sympathy and get him talking. We're real close, and he's looking at me like…he takes me in. Feels like he really sees me…the pores on my skin maybe. I need Biore.
    "You're a little crazy," he says, "you know that? Always have been. It's…interesting to me, and I don't know why. You hurry around…."
    I have finished his sentence mentally—I hurry around like a little mouse. Thank God he doesn't compare me to a rodent.
    He just…quits.
    "Is that like…a complement…or a testimony for the prosecuting attorney?" I'm thinking, the prosecutor is Jessica, but really it's him, his own indictment against himself for finding me 'interesting.'
    "No idea," he breathes in, a huge breath and lets it out in a gust as he continues to run a hand over my cans (note the s) making sure all the labels face frontwards.
    "We might have a compatible level of OCD," I say admiring his work…and his hand.
    "So much in common," he mutters. He turns to the bags then, scouring for more cans and more…perfection.
    And I have to admit, he's right. We have everything in common, including the interest. "I find you interesting too," I say. I don't know where I'm going with this…well wherever he'll let me.
    "How's that?" he says, holding those lucky cans against his chest, his hand fanned against them.
    "I…you raised Juney…all the way through. And you didn't even date…until…,"
    He cuts me off and says, "After Angela…I owed him my undivided attention…right?"
    He's not asking. He knows it was right.
    "Was it hard?"
    "No," he says tersely.
    "What…um how did you finally give yourself the green light…with Jessica?"
    I count to freaking six before he answers. "She cut my hair."
    I have a million smart things come to mind, but I make…force myself to stay focused.
    "And…that led to…?"
    He stops messing with the food and says defensively, "To what?"
    "What?"
    "To what?"
    "I don't know. You tell me."
    "It led to me asking her out. Or…her asking me for a drink." He's holding celery. He grabs carrots and squeezes around me to the fridge.
    I turn and weedle in beside him. "Oh Gosh."
    "What?" he says. "You're standing in front of the drawer.
    "No way that's ready to go in," I say, and I'm doing it. Dairy on the top. I'm taking off and putting on. He's standing there with a bouquet of vegetables. I laugh a little.
    "It was spring. She asked if I wanted to go for a drink. I said let me think about it. She kept calling me. I went clear to Litchfield for my next haircut," he's laughing. "Then the next time I needed one I didn't have time to go so far. So I went in, and she was worried she'd scared me off."