Love, Nina by Nina Stibbe Read Free Book Online Page B

she is. She’d die if she heard.
    Ring me on Tuesday. Definitely going to Greece. I know it’s a bit last minute, but would you want to come?
    Discuss on phone on Tuesday.
    Love, Nina
    PS Anthea says I have the nicest feet she’s ever seen and she marvels at my ability to not wear shoes. She thinks it’s a wonder I don’t stub my toe. I didn’t tell her that I do (stub my toe). I just took the praise.
    *  *  *
    Dear Vic,
    It’s a hard-water area, not bleachy tasting, but makes fluffy hair less so (good for me but bad for someone with coarse, thick hair). Some people have water filter jug things but they’re a bit of a faff, to be honest. You have to keep topping them up and it’s easy to forget. Also, if you pour quickly, the water comes out of the top (i.e. not filtered) so what’s the point. Plus, if everything else in your house is all charming and junky, why would you want an ugly plastic jug? You wouldn’t.
    Been trying out a side ponytail. Quite short, but at the side (low). It’s OK but can’t decide if it’s stylish or strange.
    MK: What’s happened?
    Me: I’m trying a side pony.
    MK: How’s it going?
    Me: Can’t tell if it looks strange or stylish.
    MK: It could be neither, or both.
    Will played a good trick on Sam and me. The lights and telly went off.
    Will: ( shining a torch around ) Shit, a power cut.
    Me: Did you just turn the lecky off?
    Will: What makes you think that?
    Me: You went into the utility room with a torch just before the lecky went off.
    Will: I had a premonition and went for a pee.
    Sam and I went to 57. Saw a basket of clean washing all neatly folded with a pair of Nunney’s boxer shorts on top (stripy, ironed). I threw them at Sam, Sam threw them back and they ended up out of the window (second floor). They were meant to drop down onto Nunney and Tom in the garden but they caught on a tree branch.
    Then yesterday went to National Gallery with Nunney. He likes it there (the big scenes). After we’d looked at all the art, he tricked me into hanging off a high wall by the entrance steps and pulled my trousers down. Loads of people around. Me in Mickey Mouse pants.
    Me: How could you do that in a public place?
    N: I took no pleasure in it—simply a taste of your own medicine.
    Me: I was vulnerable.
    N: That’s when to strike—as you know.
    Hope you’re well. Try to come down soon. Or I’ll go there.
    Love, Nina
    *  *  *
    May 1983
    Dear Vic,
    AB has started bringing a little can of beer round with him (lager).
    Me: Why don’t you bring a few cans over and leave them in the fridge?
    MK: He can manage them one at a time.
    AB: They are cold to carry.
    MK: Wear gloves.
    Will got new trainers. White with green. I liked the box.
    Me: I’m going to keep this box.
    MK: What’s this keeping boxes thing?
    Me: It’s just one box.
    MK: You kept one the other day.
    Me: That was a bag.
    MK: Boxes, bags—are you planning to run away?
    Jez gave Sam a sexy pen. Press the top and the woman’s bra disappears. We all like it and keep pressing the top to see the bra disappear.
    MK: Don’t take it to school.
    Sam: Why not?
    MK: Your teacher will confiscate it.
    Sam: What do you mean?
    MK: She’ll take it from you.
    Sam: She won’t want it.
    Mr. Mackie, Sam’s eye doctor, has suggested I consider a nose job (he’s got a friend who’s a plastic surgeon in the same consulting suite and he’d be happy to make an introduction, he said). Mr. Mackie thinks I’d be very pretty if I sorted my nose out. Told Nunney. Nunney thinks it’s unimpressive of Mr. Mackie to try and drum up business for his mate and that people shouldn’t fuck about with what nature’s dealt them—unless it’s life-threatening.
    Me and Jez back 14th/15th. I’m going to teach him to drive. Have already done dummy run in Saab, but he’s not insured to