Lysistrata by Fletcher Flora Read Free Book Online

harder he tried to achieve an attitude of indifference, the more offended he felt, and the sulkier he looked. He was, in fact, beginning to feel that the situation smacked of conspiracy, and that he was somehow being made a fool of. The only honorable thing to do in the circumstances, he thought, was to retire with dignity.
    “Although I am enjoying the eels and the wine,” he said after a few minutes, “I now feel that I must leave.”
    “Leave?” Acron looked at him with astonishment. “Why must you leave? It’s quite early yet, Cadmus.”
    “Yes, it is. It is far earlier than I would ordinarily leave the table of a friend, but I definitely feel that I am an outsider here, and not wanted.”
    “Oh, don’t be ridiculous, Cadmus,” Lycon said. “Of course you’re wanted.”
    “Nevertheless, it is not courteous of you to make sly references to something which I am not permitted to know. It’s disconcerting to me, as you must surely realize.”
    “I apologize.”
    “That does not alter the situation in the least.”
    “Well, I can see that you are determined to know what it is that depresses me. It’s a personal matter, and rather humiliating, but I am prepared to tell you rather than have you accuse me of being deficient in hospitality. As a matter of fact, it’s Lysistrata.”
    “Lysistrata? That’s difficult to believe. I’ll tell you frankly, as a friend whose motives are surely above suspicion, that Lysistrata is a woman who can disturb a man in various pleasant ways, but I find it incredible that she can be depressing. Especially to her husband who has just returned after seven months in Pylos.”
    “At any rate,” said Lycon, “it’s true. Lysistrata has depressed me.”
    “If you say so, it must be true, but I can scarcely believe it.”
    “She has refused to receive him in her bedchamber,” Acron said.
    “What? What’s that?” Cadmus turned to Acron with his eyes bulging a little. “Did I understand you properly? She has refused to accommodate her husband?”
    “That’s what I said.”
    “Well, isn’t that treason or mutiny or some kind of crime? Surely she can be beaten or renounced for such behavior!”
    “True. Besides a beating or renunciation, there are also several other permissible actions that could be taken, but all of them, in the end, are no more than unsatisfactory alternatives to what is really desired.”
    “I can see that,” said Cadmus. “I certainly can. When did she refuse you, if I may ask?”
    “Only this morning. I went to her at once like a devoted husband, of course.”
    “I can see that you behaved correctly, and have nothing to reproach yourself for. Did she attempt to explain her unreasonable attitude?”
    “Feebly. She said that I was gone so much that she had lost the habit and was considering the study of philosophy as a substitute. Apparently she is annoyed because the war takes up more of my time than she thinks proper.”
    “Women are constantly complaining about the war, including my own wife, but I have never before heard of one taking such a radical position, and I don’t mind saying that I consider it a serious menace to us all. Suppose it were adopted by women generally.”
    “Knowing Athenian women, I hardly think that likely.”
    “Did you think it likely of Lysistrata?”
    “No, I didn’t, as a matter of fact. It never once occurred to me.”
    “Well, then.”
    Cadmus ate a few more grapes and drank more wine, but now he seemed to get no pleasure from either. He looked at Lycon as if, on second thought, he held his host responsible for getting into difficulties that might have to be shared by others, including Cadmus.
    “I declare, Lycon,” he said crossly, “you have quite spoiled my pleasure in the evening. I am a peculiarly sensitive man, and always easily disturbed by abnormalities of this sort. I believe that I had better go home at once, and if you want my advice, I would tell you to settle this business to your