MA09 Myth Inc in Action by Robert Asprin Read Free Book Online Page B

Nunzio, who gave a disbelievin’ whistle through his teeth as he stepped back.
    Somethin’ in my voice or the way I was drawin’ myself up to my full height must have triggered the sergeant’s survival instinct, ‘cause all of a sudden he looked around nervous-like as if he were tryin’ to find an emergency exit door.
    “WHAT ARE YOU ALL DOING JUST STANDING AROUND??!!!” he bellows, turnin’ his attention from me to the crowd which has gathered around us. “YOU’RE SUPPOSED TO BE QUALIFYING!! MOVE IT!!! NOW!!!”
    This interruption gives me time to get my temper under control, and, after coolin’ down a bit I decide it is just as well the episode has drawn to a close. It seems, however, that the sergeant has a few last words for me.
    “Guido!” he sez, just loud enough for me to hear, not lookin’ me in the face.
    “Yeah, Sergeant?”
    “This isn’t the time or the place, but we will continue this discussion... later.”
    The way he said it, it wasn’t a challenge or a threat... just a statement.

NUNZIO AND ME was tryin’ to figure out what it was they had put on our plates under the laughin’ title of “dinner,” when Spyder plops down next to us. We’re a little surprised at this, as we’re normally left to ourselves when dinin’, but the reason for her forwardness is not long in comin’.
    “You guys are with the Mob, aren’t you,” she sez, without so much as a ‘Hello’ or ‘Nice evening.’
    Now, way back in the intro, I mentioned that we are not real big on bein’ asked questions in general, and this specific question is a definite no-no.
    “Are you a cop?” Nunzio shoots back, automatic-like.
    This is a ‘Must Learn’ question for anyone whose livelihood depends on extra-legal activities, as if one asks it of a cop, however undercover they might be, they have to acknowledge their profession. Otherwise, any attempt to use the followin’ conversation as evidence is dismissed as entrapment.
    “Me? Are you kidding? No, I’m not a cop. Why do you ask?”
    “Why do you want to know if we’re in the Mob?” Nunzio shoots back.
    You will notice that at this point, Spyder has answered our question, but we have not yet given a ‘yea’ or ‘nay’ to hers. Like I say, one has an inclination towards caginess in our line of work. Maybe it’s a habit resultin’ from our regular and prolonged discussions with DAs and Grand Juries.
    “I’ve been thinking of trying to join up with them once I get out of the army,” she sez with a shrug. “I thought maybe you guys could give me a little information about what it’s like workin’ for the Mob, if not give me a recommendation or at least a contact.”
    “Connection.”
    “What’s that, Swatter?”
    “I said ‘Connection.’ In normal business you have contacts. In the Mob, the first step is to get ‘connected.’”
    “...Or so we’ve heard.” Nunzio sez quick-like, givin’ me one of his dirty looks. “I dunno. We might be able to share a few rumors with you. What do you want to know?”
    As you can see, my cousin is still bein’ cautious, havin’ less faith than I do in a ‘hear-say’ defense. With his ‘rumor’ gambit, however, he has opened the door for us to answer a few questions ‘bout the Mob without actually admittin’ to any affiliation on our part.
    “Well, what’s it like?”
    “The hours are lousy,” I sez.
    “...And the retirement plan leaves a lot to be desired,” Nunzio adds.
    “...But the pay’s good. Right?” Spyder urges.
    I have mentioned before that my cousin has few loves greater than the desire to lecture, and this chick has just pushed one of his favorite buttons. While he does not relax completely, he defrosts a bit.
    “Not as good as you’d think from what the media says,” he squeaks. “You see... remember what Guido said a second ago about being connected? Well, for a long time, when you first join the Mob, you actually have to pay us... strike that... them instead of the other