Mood Indigo by Boris Vian Read Free Book Online Page B

‘It’s not very kind of you.’
    â€˜Are you pleased to see me?’ said Chloe.
    â€˜Oh, yes! Oh, yes! …’ said Colin.
    They started walking, letting the first pavement they came across guide their steps. A little pink cloud came down from the air and drew up close beside them.
    â€˜I’m going your way,’ it winked.
    â€˜Let’s step on then,’ said Colin.
    And the cloud wrapped itself round them. Inside the cloud it was warm, and it smelt of candy-floss and cinnamon.
    â€˜Nobody can see us any more! …’ said Colin. ‘But we can still see everything that is going on! …’
    â€˜I think it is slightly transparent,’ said Chloe. ‘Better be careful!’
    â€˜Who cares? And besides, it’s much cosier,’ said Colin. ‘What would you like to do? …’
    â€˜Just walk … Would that bore you?’
    â€˜Not if you tell me stories…’
    â€˜I don’t know any nice enough,’ said Chloe. ‘Let’s see what’s in the shop windows. Look at that! … Isn’t it interesting …’
    In the window a beautiful woman was lying on a spring mattress. Her breasts were exposed and an apparatus with fine white and long silky-haired brushes was steadily stroking them upwards. A notice at the side said
Save Shoe Leather With Reverend Charles’s Antipodes
.
    â€˜What a good idea,’ said Chloe.
    â€˜I don’t get the connexion! …’ said Colin. ‘Anyway, it’s much more fun to do it with your hands.’
    Chloe blushed.
    â€˜Don’t say things like that. I don’t like boys who say naughty things to girls.’
    â€˜I’m awfully sorry …’ said Colin. ‘I didn’t mean …’
    He seemed so dejected that she smiled and nudged him playfully to show that she wasn’t seriously angry.
    In another window a fat man with a butcher’s apron was cutting the throats of little children. It was a display advertising Family Allowances.
    â€˜So that’s where all our money goes,’ said Colin. ‘It must cost a terrible lot to clear that up every evening.’
    â€˜They’re not real! …’ said Chloe, alarmed.
    â€˜How do you know?’ said Colin. ‘They get them for nothing on the National Assistance …’
    â€˜I don’t like it,’ said Chloe. ‘We never used to have things like that in the shop windows. I don’t think it’s much of an improvement.’
    â€˜It doesn’t matter,’ said Colin. ‘It only affects people who already believe in that stupid kind of thing …’
    â€˜And what’s this? …’ said Chloe.
    In the next window was a fat round cherubic stomach sitting on a pair of rubber wheels. The notice read
Yours Won’t Have Wrinkles Either If You Smooth It With An Electric Iron
.
    â€˜But I can recognize that! …’ said Colin. ‘It belongs to Serge, my old cook! … What’s it doing there?’
    â€˜Don’t start worrying about that,’ said Chloe. ‘I’m not going to let you find fault with that belly. It’s far too fat, anyway …’
    â€˜That’s because he was such a marvellous cook! …’
    â€˜Let’s go somewhere else,’ said Chloe. ‘I don’t want to do any more window-shopping. I don’t like it so much now.’
    â€˜What shall we do then?’ said Colin. ‘Shall we have some tea somewhere?’
    â€˜Oh! … It isn’t tea-time … Anyway, I prefer coffee.’ Colin, relieved, took a deep breath, and his braces snapped.
    â€˜What was that funny noise?’
    â€˜I trod on a dead twig,’ said Colin, blushing.
    â€˜How about a walk in the park?’ said Chloe.
    Colin looked at her, delighted.
    â€˜That’s a marvellous idea. There won’t be anyone about.’
    This time Chloe blushed.
    â€˜That’s not why I