My Man Jeeves

My Man Jeeves by P. G. Wodehouse Read Free Book Online Page A

Book: My Man Jeeves by P. G. Wodehouse Read Free Book Online
Authors: P. G. Wodehouse
that when I went yesterday afternoon to Blackwell's Island prison, to secure material for my book, I saw poor, dear Wilmot there, dressed in a striped suit, seated beside a pile of stones with a hammer in his hands?"
    I tried to think of something to say, but nothing came. A chappie has to be a lot broader about the forehead than I am to handle a jolt like this. I strained the old bean till it creaked, but between the collar and the hair parting nothing stirred. I was dumb. Which was lucky, because I wouldn't have had a chance to get any persiflage out of my system. Lady Malvern collared the conversation. She had been bottling it up, and now it came out with a rush:
    "So this is how you have looked after my poor, dear boy, Mr. Wooster! So this is how you have abused my trust! I left him in your charge, thinking that I could rely on you to shield him from evil. He came to you innocent, unversed in the ways of the world, confiding, unused to the temptations of a large city, and you led him astray!"
    I hadn't any remarks to make. All I could think of was the picture of Aunt Agatha drinking all this in and reaching out to sharpen the hatchet against my return.
    "You deliberately——"
    Far away in the misty distance a soft voice spoke:
    "If I might explain, your ladyship."
    Jeeves had projected himself in from the dining–room and materialized on the rug. Lady Malvern tried to freeze him with a look, but you can't do that sort of thing to Jeeves. He is look–proof.
    "I fancy, your ladyship, that you have misunderstood Mr. Wooster, and that he may have given you the impression that he was in New York when his lordship—was removed. When Mr. Wooster informed your ladyship that his lordship had gone to Boston, he was relying on the version I had given him of his lordship's movements. Mr. Wooster was away, visiting a friend in the country, at the time, and knew nothing of the matter till your ladyship informed him."
    Lady Malvern gave a kind of grunt. It didn't rattle Jeeves.
    "I feared Mr. Wooster might be disturbed if he knew the truth, as he is so attached to his lordship and has taken such pains to look after him, so I took the liberty of telling him that his lordship had gone away for a visit. It might have been hard for Mr. Wooster to believe that his lordship had gone to prison voluntarily and from the best motives, but your ladyship, knowing him better, will readily understand."
    "What!" Lady Malvern goggled at him. "Did you say that Lord Pershore went to prison voluntarily?"
    "If I might explain, your ladyship. I think that your ladyship's parting words made a deep impression on his lordship. I have frequently heard him speak to Mr. Wooster of his desire to do something to follow your ladyship's instructions and collect material for your ladyship's book on America. Mr. Wooster will bear me out when I say that his lordship was frequently extremely depressed at the thought that he was doing so little to help."
    "Absolutely, by Jove! Quite pipped about it!" I said.
    "The idea of making a personal examination into the prison system of the country—from within—occurred to his lordship very suddenly one night. He embraced it eagerly. There was no restraining him."
    Lady Malvern looked at Jeeves, then at me, then at Jeeves again. I could see her struggling with the thing.
    "Surely, your ladyship," said Jeeves, "it is more reasonable to suppose that a gentleman of his lordship's character went to prison of his own volition than that he committed some breach of the law which necessitated his arrest?"
    Lady Malvern blinked. Then she got up.
    "Mr. Wooster," she said, "I apologize. I have done you an injustice. I should have known Wilmot better. I should have had more faith in his pure, fine spirit."
    "Absolutely!" I said.
    "Your breakfast is ready, sir," said Jeeves.
    I sat down and dallied in a dazed sort of way with a poached egg.
    "Jeeves," I said, "you are certainly a life–saver!"
    "Thank you, sir."
    "Nothing would have

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