Naw Much of a Talker by Pedro Lenz Read Free Book Online Page B

Cobbles oan the Saturday, Pesche tells me tae go an’ take a fuckin hike. Ah wis barred. Ahd went too far this time. Definately.
    Barred? How, Pesche, how ahm ah barred? Whit’s gi’en ye that idea? Hivin an off-day, ur ye? Naw sellt enough coffee or whit?
    Ye know how, Goalie. Ahv tellt ye often enough. Nae drugs in here. Coont yirsel lucky ahm naw cawin the polis. Noo fuck off.
    Wait a second, Pesche, wid ye. Jist a fuckin second. Calm doon an’ take a deep breath, man. There’s been a misunnerstaunin here. Must be. Ahv been hivin nuthin tae dae wi that crap.
Ahm completely aff the stuff – ah swear. Word ae honour!
    Ahm naw in the mood fur discussin it, Goalie. We found a stash oot in the toilet, jist eftir you wur here it wis. Dont try an’ tell me any diffrint. Noo leave afore ah caw the polis.
    Okay, caw the cops then. Get them tae come. Least they willnae fuckin treat me like fuckin this.
    Ahm warnin ye, Goalie.
    Ye dont like me, dae ye? Ahv known that fur ages, Pesche, ages. Ahv nivver done nuthin tae ye but. An’ ahm naw guilty. An’ that’s how ahm naw leavin till the polis come
an’ get me.
    Ah carried oan like that till Pesche got hold ae me by the collar. He did actually chuck me oot. Ah tellt him it wis sick. That he wis a sad bastard. Nae idea how ah reacted like that. That is:
course, ah know. Firstly, it dis yir nut in if yir naw allowed intae a pub ye want tae go tae. Secondly, it dis yir nut in when they try tae set ye up an’ ye urnae a dealer, it isnae fuckin
true an’ it nivver wis, naw really – naw tae be too pedantic aboot it. Thirdly, it dis yir nut in when ye realise yir bein treated unjustly an’ there’s fuck-aw ye can dae
aboot it.
    At the place where ah done ma apprenticeship, money once went missin once. Wan ae the draughtsmen wis givin it: his wallet wis missin, a wallet wi god-knows how many hunner
francs in it. Each an’ ivry wan ae us wis hauled up before the boss. It wisnae me. Wis me ivry cunt suspected but. They’d fuck-aw proof. Cos it wisnae me. See eftir that but, it wis
nivver the same again. They nivver did find oot who nicked the money. So ah wis suspected fur years cos – fur some reason – ah seemed the maist suspicious tae them aw. Nae idea how. Ma
long hair mibbe. Or cos ah wis aye skint.
    Noo, wi Pesche, ahd the exact same feelin as back then. Yir accused ae summit ye didnae dae. An’ ye feel summit like a bad conscience. An’ it’s like: yir hivin it fur some
ither cunt, ye dont even know who fur. It’s like the bad conscience ye hiv this time is staunin in fur wan ye shoulda hid anither time: fur crap ye wur responsible fur in the past. Or fur
stuff yir sure tae dae in the future at some point. At the same time but, ye feel a kinda rage in yir stomach. It’s a kinda inhibited rage, wan ye can nivver let oot cos ye’d jist be
makin yirsel even mair suspicious.
    Ah jist went hame. An’ noo, tae make things worse, Pesche’s thinkin he’s the carin type cos he didnae report me tae the polis, cos he dealt wi it himsel. Ahm supposed tae feel
grateful tae him an’ aw. Sayin that, Pesche’s naw totally kosher himsel. If yiv a guid nose, ye can smell it. Incredible, it is. At times like this, ah kid greet in despair. Whitivver
ye dae, dont think aboot it, mate. Jist dont think aboot it.
    So ah head hame, hiv some red wine, naw exactly a little. Then ah turned over an’ fell asleep oan the sofa. When ah wake up, it’s Sunday lunchtime an’ ahv a
stiff neck like nivver afore in ma life. Take a few paracetamols, ah thought, hiv a cheese-ootae-a-packet sandwich, then hiv a shower, clean yir teeth an’ hiv a shave, ah thought. Whit ah did
dae but wis phone Regula.
    Hi Regi. Buddy oot flyin his planes?
    Aye. How ye askin?
    Kid ah come roon an’ see ye furra wee bit?
    Naw, ah cannae. Ahv visitors. Ma sister’s here wi her weans.
    Regi, hiv ye any idea whit happened tae make Pesche bar me fae Cobbles?
    Ahm sure you know that better than ah