Nobody Loves a Bigfoot Like a Bigfoot Babe by Simon Okill Read Free Book Online Page A

piss, and . . ." MB sniffed and grimaced with a cough. ". . . Definitely some skunk in there, too."
    Lou and Chad stood back and watched expectantly as the amiable crypto-zoologist picked up a broken branch, inspected it, sniffed it then tossed it away. It was just a broken branch.
    MB noted the dry ground around the base of the tree was strewn with loose undergrowth that had been trampled down by several different feet, including Lou's. He closely scrutinized the shoe prints.
    MB pointed out animal tracks, "Mostly white-tailed deer, badger, fox and bobcat, nothing that would be harmful to a human. There's no sign of a grizzly print, but that doesn't mean a grizzly hadn't taken Beau . . . but. . ."
    MB inspected the trunk of the leaky tree. There were no telltale signs of clawing that always accompanied a bear attack.
    He pointed to the bark, ". . . See? . . . no claw marks. Bears always like to scratch up a tree when they piss on it." MB pointed to the ground, "I suppose these prints around the tree belong to you and the other kids as well as Beau's?"
    Chad opened his mouth to reply, but Lou answered before he could.
    "I've already ascertained those prints belong to Chad and his friends."
    Chad beamed proudly, "It's true, dude . . . those are our prints."
    Lou heaved a weary sigh and pointed to a set of particular prints. "Those must belong to Beau, see where they are deeper. That's where he stood to take a pee." She pointed to the damp bark of the tree and looked at Chad. "No-brainer here doesn't have a clue what took Beau this time."
    Chad looked indignant, "Who's calling who a no-brainer?"
    Sheriff Lou glared at Chad, "I am, dufus."
    Chad agreed with a resigned nod, "Well, that's okay, I guess."
    MB sniffed the bark of the tree. He nodded his head and wrinkled his nose.
    "That's one really bad mother of a smell!"
    "Could that be grizzly sign?" Lou asked, gagging on the stink.
    "No way, dude . . . I'm betting it's Bigfoot got him," Chad butted in over-excitedly.
    MB shrugged to Chad. Well, that was the million dollar question. No, make that a two million dollar question. Had a grizzly taken Beau? The signs said otherwise. But what if a Bigfoot had taken Beau? The notion was too fanciful to think seriously about, but the thought that Bigfoot had indeed taken Beau struck a chord in MB's delirious mind, for it amused MB to once more think upon such a notion as the existence of the elusive Bigfoot.
    Thump! Back on planet earth, MB could find no sign of Bigfoot prints, real or fake, no Bigfoot hair, or any other sign to indicate that the non-existent creature had been here. MB sighed inwardly with the thought that, yet again, he had failed to find conclusive evidence that Bigfoot existed.
    Without evidence to support what had happened to Beau, who or what had taken him was anybody's guess. If indeed anything untoward had happened to Beau. He was more than likely just fooling around, thought MB. The lack of evidence certainly confirmed that hypothesis.
    "Doubtful it was a grizzly," MB mused. "I don't see anything to support that scenario here. There's no sign of a struggle. See? No blood. No torn clothing. Sure, there are several different sets of human footprints and some animal prints, but nothing to indicate anything bad happened here."
    Lou peered down at the ground and looked thoughtful. "My gut tells me Beau's just fooling around, as usual."
    "Can I quote you on that?" MB said.
    "No way, man . . . something took him. If it's Bigfoot . . . I wonder what it's doing with him," Chad said, eyes wide with excitement. "Hey, dude . . . do Bigfoot eat people, like in that movie,
Abominable
?" Chad chuckled, "That was so awesome!"
    Lou asked, "You're the expert, make a guess?"
    MB sighed heavily, "What . . . whether Bigfoot eat people or not?" He saw the look on Lou's face. She was beginning to lose it. What the fuck. "Old Indian legend tells us that man who makes a guess sometimes guesses wrong."
    Chad chuckled at MB's