North Star by Karly Lane Read Free Book Online Page A

slightly. ‘I had to take out a court order against him.’
    John sat a little straighter in his seat. ‘He’s abusive?’
    â€˜He’s not, but the people he seems to attract are.’ Kate saw his confusion. ‘My ex-husband has a gambling problem. He was always a bit of a gambler, nothing too serious, until a few years ago when he lost his job and had trouble finding another one. The longer he was out of work, the more depressed and irritable he got. Eventually he just gave up looking for work. He used to tell me he was job hunting and then go to the pub and bet on the TAB all day. We ended up with huge credit card debts. It was horrible,’ she said, recalling the sick feeling of those days and almost tasting the bile in her mouth.
    â€˜We’d worked so hard to buy our house. We pumped everything into the loan and had it paid off in twelve years. It was such a great feeling.’ She glanced up at John with a small spark of pride. ‘All the scrimping and scraping was worth it to know that we owned our house outright.’ She smiled a little as she remembered, but it soon slipped and she blinked quickly to stave off tears.
    â€˜He’d started borrowing from loan sharks. I have no idea where he found them, but they weren’t too fussy about lending him the money he couldn’t get legitimately without needing me to co-sign. By the time I found out the extent of the debt he’d gotten into, it was out of control. We sold the house to pay off the debts and moved into a dingy little apartment and tried to start all over again.’
    â€˜You didn’t leave him straightaway then?’ John asked.
    Kate shook her head. ‘It put a strain on an already shaky relationship. I found it hard to trust him after that, but he seemed so remorseful. He promised to get counselling and I really wanted to believe him, you know?’ She looked up, searching John’s eyes for a moment before shaking her head once more and dropping her gaze back to the table. ‘I guess it makes me the bigger fool for thinking I could believe him, but we were married, and you have to make sacrifices sometimes.’
    John didn’t comment, and Kate realised he was simply allowing her time to collect her thoughts and continue.
    â€˜Eventually it just got too hard. The kids were miserable, I was tired and worried sick about how we were going to make it to the next pay cheque . . . and he was still gambling whenever he had the chance.’ Her voice sounded empty of emotion. ‘I filed for divorce, got a second job and life was almost normal for a while.
    â€˜Then one weekend when he had the kids, he was attacked by two men who came to collect money he owed them. Luckily, the kids were asleep and didn’t actually witness it. They were brought back to me by the police, and I took out a restraining order and immediately applied for sole custody, which the court approved, thank God. I couldn’t risk the kids being near him when he was dealing with people like that.’
    â€˜So the kids know about his gambling?’
    She shook her head. ‘No, I’ve told them that he isn’t well and that he needs to get help, and that until he does he isn’t capable of taking care of them.’ She saw his eyebrow arch in surprise and gave a sigh. ‘How do you explain an addiction that turns the man they love and worship into such a selfish, lying manipulator? They don’t see him the way he is when he’s gambling, they only see their dad, the man who showers them with gifts when he’s on a winning streak. They don’t see the damage he’s done to our lives. Trying to explain it does nothing but make me out to be the bad guy who took them away from their father.’
    â€˜So you just let them think it was your fault?’
    She gave a tired shrug. ‘They’ll figure it out soon enough, but for now I just want them to be kids without