o 0df2dc86c31d22a8 by Unknown Read Free Book Online Page A

YOUR life.
    So.
    My life …
    Let’s see. It’s fifty-six degrees outside.
    The math homework is impossible.
    My sneakers are wearing out.
    It’s almost bedtime.
    Thank God.
    — Up After Midnight —
    This Is Beginning to Become a Habit
    Well, bedtime came and went. And you sat there and tried to think of something ELSE to write, but you couldn’t, so you read and listened to the radio until you were bored and thirsty, at which point you headed for the kitchen.
    Lo and behold, Ted was there, sneaking a dish of ice cream, and you grunted hello.
    T: “Can’t sleep, huh?”
    D: “Nope.”
    T: “Girl trouble?”
    (Please.)
    D: “Not exactly.”
    T: “Well, what, exactly?”
    D: “Nothing.”
    T: “Come on, bro, what’s on your mind?”
    And suddenly you felt like you-know-who, all bottled up with nowhere to go, which was stupid because Ted seemed to be in a decent mood, the kitchen was quiet, and you felt comfortable in a way you hadn’t felt since before Mom and Dad returned, as if the house was yours again, just the two of you shooting the breeze at midnight.
    You got a glass of water, sank into a kitchen chair, and began to talk — keeping it light, skimming the details, not wanting to bore him — until you realized THIS IS YOUR BROTHER
    and he’s bored you PLENTY over the years, and if you can’t talk to him, who, then?
    So you unloaded. You talked about Alex’s moods, Alex’s absences from school, the rock-
    climbing incident, the way your life had become CONSUMED by Alex’s problems.
    D: “My best friend is being sucked into his own private black hole, and I’m diving in after him.
    My other best friends are all eighth-grade girls, and I can’t talk to THEM about this. So I keep it to myself. And it affects everything in my life. School. My friendships.”
    T: “And then, in the middle of all this, Mom and Dad come home.”
    D: “Right. I felt so strange at the airport, picking them up. Uncomfortable. Same thing at Disneyland. I mean, I should be happy they’re home. We’re going to be together for
    Christmas.”
    T: “Well, life is sometimes like that.”
    D: “My life, anyway.”
    T: “Hey, I feel strange about Mom and Dad too. I felt especially strange at Disneyland.”
    D: “You didn’t seem that way. You were acting like a little kid!”
    T: “Overcompensation. That’s like an exaggerated reaction to cover up how you’re really feeling. You’ll learn about that in Psych 101.”
    (Thank you, Dr. Freud.)
    D: “So that was an act?”
    T: “Sort of. I mean, I feel weird even now. Listen to us, all whispery and quiet. A week ago, we’d be in here crashing around, not worrying about waking anyone up, not caring about who’ll notice the food missing from the fridge. It’s different now.”
    Ever since that conversation, you’ve been thinking about that difference.
    Part of you wants everything to be the same. Mom, Dad, Ted, Ducky, apple pie, Disneyland.
    But you know it can’t be that way. Not totally.
    Before Mom and Dad came home, you’d gotten used to a new life.
    Independent. Free.
    You hate to admit it, but part of you is looking forward to their next trip.
    Tuesday 12/8
    Study Hall
    Three tests Friday. You thought they weren’t supposed to schedule so many in one day.
    Big trouble. Have to cut this short.
    BTW, Alex in school today. (Hooray.)
    Didn’t say much to you, though. Looked tired.
    As usual.
    Late-night Ramblings
    Half-open Eyes
    Mom and Dad so quiet during dinner. Dad’s mad, I think. Don’t know why.
    More details as they become available.
    Midweek Checkup
    or, The Remains of a Once-Vital Youth:
    Ducky, We Hardly Knew Ye
    Studied till 11:30 last night. Ouch.
    You feel like dry toast today.
    Saw Alex at lunch. He must not have seen you. He came in late and took a seat alone by the window. You had dessert with him, but he was very quiet so you didn’t force the conversation.
    When you went your separate ways afterward, he didn’t even say good-bye.
    On your way