Once Upon a Caveman

Once Upon a Caveman by Cassandra Gannon Read Free Book Online

Book: Once Upon a Caveman by Cassandra Gannon Read Free Book Online
Authors: Cassandra Gannon
back to New York by now, except us.  All we know for sure is
that we’re stuck here in Lord of the Flies , all thanks to you .”
    Back
in high school, Lucy had been smitten with Teddy O’Connell, president of the
senior class and co-founder of the computer club.  She’d always had a weakness
for smart guys.  Teddy, the kind-of-nerdy hunk, had gone on to make billions
with some internet whatsit.  Of course, he couldn’t be stuck on this
island with her.  Oh, no.  It had to be this asshole.
    “Warren,
if you keep it up, I will personally hold you under the water and you can see
for yourself if the ship is down at the bottom of…”  Lucy stopped short.
    A
sabretooth tiger was staring at them.
    For
real.
    It
was a sabretooth fucking tiger.
    Lucy’s
master’s degree in paleontology couldn’t land her any job beyond retail book
sales, but it made it simple for her to identify extinct Ice Age mammals when
they came prowling down the beach in front of her.
    In
a state of shock, her mind instinctively started pulling facts from the endless
college courses she’d taken.  Sabretooth cat would actually be the
correct term for the animal.  From the extinct genus of smilodon.   It
wasn’t really related to tigers, although its coat had a shaded pattern of
streaks and spots to help it blend in with the surroundings.  Approximately
seven hundred pounds.  Short-ish tail.  Built more like a bear than a modern
lion.  Thought to use their massive fangs to pierce the skin of their prey, so
they’d bleed to death…
    Warren
gave a supersonic scream of pent up terror, interrupting her mental checklist
of facts.  Before Lucy could warn him not to move, he took off running into the
forest.
    The
cat took off after him.
    “Warren! 
Damn it!”  Against her better judgment, Lucy headed into the forest.  “If you
run, you’re going to make yourself prey!”
    Except,
he already was prey.
    They
both were.
    God,
what the hell was happening here?  Even a polar bear would’ve made more sense. 
Sabretooth cats had been extinct for about nine thousand years.  There couldn’t possibly be an actual living specimen on this island.
    It
was hard to misidentify the eight inch long fangs jutting down from the
animal’s upper jaw, though.  What the hell else could it possibly be? 
Lucy’s mind was racing, trying to come up with a halfway reasonable
explanation.  Maybe it was some kind of genetic experiment.  Maybe this whole
place was like the Island of Dr. Moreau or something.
    “Warren!” 
She’d lost sight of him in the woods.  “Warren, if you can hear me, try to get
up a tree!”  The mountains in the middle of the island grew bigger as she
pressed forward.  Perfect.  She was headed towards a smoldering volcano
to find a guy who’d tormented her throughout her teenage existence.  That made
even less sense than the sabretooth.  At least, she wanted to see the
cat, again.  The animal was a legitimate miracle.  She hoped to God Warren
didn’t hurt it.
    “ Helllllp! ”
    His
voice sounded like it was coming from her left.  Lucy switched direction, even
though she had no clue what she was going to do once she found him.  How was
she going to stop a gigantic carnivore from devouring that moron?  She didn’t
want to harm the cat, but she couldn’t let Warren die.
    Well, theoretically anyhow.
    Hopefully,
she wouldn’t have to choose between them, because it would be a tough decision. 
First off, she was a vegetarian, so killing animals was kinda a no-no. 
Secondly, the sabretooth really would contribute more to the world than Warren. 
Even his eternally disappointed parents would’ve agreed with that.  The Pleses
had never gotten over Warren’s failure at that damn homecoming game.  Maybe she
could just scare the cat away.
    Scanning
around for some kind of weapon, Lucy finally decided on a fallen branch from
one of the bizarre piney-palm trees.  It was sturdy and thick… and would do
absolutely

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