Perfectly Pure and Good by Frances Fyfield Read Free Book Online Page A

digging a hole in his carpet, absorbing the constant trembling of her limbs. I'd be so much better, Julian thought, if I talked to them more, the way I used to, but I can't bear it. Women of virtue like this are the worst, so patient and kind they take a piece of you. I've nothing to give them, even when I like them as much as this, I can't be patient. He turned the bark into a laugh and finished the prescription. `Mustn't complain, mustn't complain,' he said, testily.
    `Why not?' she said surprisingly. 'It's allowed. We all got problems. Perhaps you should try living alone. You've been the same since your father passed away. There was a time when you had a kind word for everyone. I suppose they call it stress.' Snatching the prescription quickly to avoid more than a split-second release of the stick, she was on her way to the door. Oh Lord, he thought, I should be helping her, instead of sitting here like an inconsiderate dummy.
    In his own confusion and her rumbling movements, he still recognized something horribly astute.
    Ì appreciate it's very hard living alone, Miss Gloomer . . he began to say, trying to make amends with a particle of conversation. She stopped dead and cackled.
    `Don't you believe it. Only thing I ever got right. Even if it is frightening, sometimes.'
    Ì'll probably see you later.'
    `No need. Only if it suits you.'
    This time his smile was right from the eyes. He heard the stick guide her down the corridor and waited before pressing the bell. Living alone seemed like a vision of heaven and he would appreciate it now if the next patient was a hooligan tourist deserving of rudeness. 'Next!' he yelled, when the bell brought no response. Nurse popped into the room, smiling, her endless cheerfulness like sand in a graze.
    `You've been through them all like a dose of salts today, Doctor. Reckon that's the lot and you can go home.'
    Òh. Dr Freeman finished too, has he? Or would he like me to take one of his?'
    She shifted uncomfortably. 'Well no, I don't think so. He's got a couple waiting, but they're his regulars, if you see what I mean.'

    Dr Freeman was far more popular than Dr Pardoe. Nor did nice-natured women freeze him in his tracks. Once upon a time it had been the other way round.
    Julian did not know if fury or relief was uppermost in his mind as he strode to his car. Relief to be out of the ugly modern medical centre with its compassionate efficiency, or fury with himself for skimping time with the patients and shying away from the opposite sex as if they could sting him. If only he could emulate the charm of Dr Freeman; give each one his undivided attention, instead of champing at the bit, brooding, hating himself, moving from one captivity to the next, taking no comfort.
    The interior of his car was overpoweringly hot. It had been cleaned that morning in readiness for house calls to patients who would tell him about ghosts, as if he did not have enough of his own.
    Freeman's car was carelessly filthy and parked beneath a tree. Julian wondered what had happened to his comfortable dreams and the endless sympathy he had once commanded, felt faintly savage, ashamed of himself for his own, dogged misery.
    There was a smart red car with a dent, parked next to his own in the space marked 'doctors only'.
    The sight of an inconsiderate outsider only increased his irritation.
    Sarah Fortune felt a stranger, off territory and slightly confused. She was not due to reach the Pardoes until early evening and it was only early afternoon. She had several motives for reaching the village sooner than expected, but was unsure which to take first, so she dawdled in the high street, trying to orientate herself.
    In briefing her for this task, Ernest Matthewson had been deliberately economical with the background information he had given her, which consisted of an Ordnance Survey map, directions and little else. She was left to glean what she could of the family who were paying her fees and giving her a place to stay