Real Vampires Don't Diet by Gerry Bartlett Read Free Book Online Page B

effects of his binge drinking the night before. His whole body had been shaking, his head splitting and he'd been violently sick and throwing up. Fortunately, he'd managed to stagger into the bathroom before that happened. When he'd finally collapsed on the tile floor, I'd washed his face, helped him rinse out his mouth, and then carried him back to bed. Yeah, we'd had loads of fun.
    In a note, because he really couldn't squawk a single syllable, Ray had admitted he'd already polished off one whole bottle of Jack Daniel's and was on his second when Valdez and I had arrived. No wonder he was in such a bad way.
    "Ray, roll over." Nate had found a black sweatshirt and tugged it over Ray's head. "I'm going to the drugstore. I'll get some throat lozenges, cough syrup. First I'll call Dr. Calvin and get a prescription. You know he'll take care of it for you, even on a holiday."
    "Forget it, Nathan." I put a hand on his arm. "Mortal medicine won't help Ray now."
    "Then what the hell will?" Nathan was desperate. "This is critical, Glory. The label execs set this up. Sienna's young, appeals to a different demographic than Ray." We both saw Ray fall back on the bed again. His eyes had never opened. "Not that you're old, buddy. Thirty-seven? Hell, we're both in our prime. Hah. Hah." Nate grabbed my arm and pulled me out to the hall.
    "What can we do, Glory? This Grammy thing You read the tabloids. Ray's sales are still strong. Of course they are, but the duet with Sienna put us right back up where we belong. Ray has to do this gig and be great. Keep the ball rolling while we record his new album. He and Sienna need the rehearsal time. Work some of your vampire magic here. Surely there's something you can do."
    "I'm not sure. I avoid alcohol for this very reason. I'm not into pain and suffering."
    "Unless it's for Cheetos." Valdez was parked near the bedroom door and had come in with Nate. Nathan looked from me to Valdez. "I don't get it. Will's a vampire and Valdez said he was drunk last night. Now he's downstairs cooking, business as usual. Hell, he's got a Scotch next to him right now. Why isn't he laid out, begging for a stake through the heart? Is it because Ray's new at this game?"
    Valdez didn't wait for me to answer Nathan. "Will's a different kind of vampire from your buddy Ray. He was born from another vamp, not made like Ray and Glory were. Will can eat, drink and be merry in ways made vamps can't. Ask Glory about those Cheetos sometime."
    "He's right." I gave Valdez an evil smile and a mental promise to boycott Cheetos, which were also one of his favorite snacks. Oh, and forget Twinkies too. He slumped to the floor, his tail down. I'm sure if I bothered to read his mind, I'd get called a few names I'd rather not hear. Tough.
    "Well, hell." Nate walked back into the bedroom and pulled the covers up to Ray's chin again. "Now what?"
    "I'm thinking." I sat on the foot of the bed. "There might be something another vampire could do for Ray, to dilute the effects of the alcohol. Unfortunately, if Will's still drinking, then I guess it's on me."
    "So how do you help Ray?" Nathan had almost shredded the list in his hand. I hope he had another copy. "He's got to be able to sing by tomorrow morning. Oh, shit, I mean night. We'll have to come up with reasons why he can only rehearse at night. Maybe we'll tell Sienna the truth. She's pretty cool. Have you seen her video for 'Nightmare'?"
    "The vampires in her video were caricatures. Fake fangs, blood dripping all over the place and Sienna lying half naked in an open coffin like a virgin sacrifice." I laughed but not in amusement. "Is that how you see us, Nate?" I heard Valdez snort beside me.
    "Of course not." Nathan put his hand on my shoulder. "But it shows"
    "It shows Sienna's trying to jump on the paranormal trendy train. I bet she'd freak if you told her anything about Ray and what happened to him. Promise me you won't say a word to her until we discuss this, Nate. I mean it.