Reason Is You (9781101576151) by Sharla Lovelace Read Free Book Online Page B

different places. My family’s all spread out, so I guess I have to go get closure with all their deadbeat asses before I can relax.”
    I laughed. “Good luck with that.”
    She grinned then and brandished her ugly orange purse. “Thanks for the company. Even for just a minute. It gets lonely where I am.”
    I focused back on my mother’s headstone. “I understand that all too well.”
    A T a little after midnight, I was tired of being wide awake horizontal so I tiptoed downstairs. Got a glass of milk and a leftover roll from supper and headed out to the porch. Bojangles lifted his head in interest of the dinner roll, wiggled his nose a bit, then decided it wasn’t worth the effort. Meat might have been a different story.
    I settled onto the porch swing with a blanket I hadn’t brought for warmth—there was plenty of that. I needed the comfort in whatever way I could find. In the night sounds of the breeze turning the metal propellers of the weather-vane plane and the crickets and locusts and whatever else was out there partying in the thick air. Probably big tree roaches, too, but I chose denial on that one and it was too dark to prove otherwise.
    My dad was so happy about my job. I didn’t have the heart to tell him how much I dreaded dragging my ass down there again to field crap from old “friends” that probably wagged tongues all over town. Tomorrow would bring a whole new shift of the newly informed pretending to be surprised.
    I knew I felt sorry for myself and part of me despised that but the other part was PMSing and didn’t care.
    “What the hell am I doing?” I whispered to the night.
    “Whatever you have to,” it whispered back as the skin on my neck burned.
    I jumped and jerked to my left to see Alex lean against the rail. I licked my lips.
    “Guess I have to get used to that again.”
    “I have faith in you.”
    He crossed the porch and joined me on the swing, careful not to touch me. People touch ghosts all the time and don’t realize it. Feelings of déjà vu, confusion, random illogical thoughts, losing your way midsentence. Longer contact is more intense, for both. You feel everything they feel and vice versa. All I know is Alex always made it a point to avoid it, so I assumed it wasn’t a good thing for them.
    “So, what brings you out here where there might be cockroaches?”
    I shivered. “Was trying to block that, thank you.”
    “Just saying.”
    I sighed. “Can’t sleep. Too excited about work tomorrow—today—whatever.”
    “Your dedication is inspiring.”
    I sighed. “Yeah, I’m all that.”
    He was quiet for a moment, probably to let my self-pity firmly root itself.
    “It’s just temporary, Dani.”
    “Really?”
    He sighed impatiently and looked away.
    “No, seriously, Alex. Really? Because my dad sings that same song. Do y’all see a lot of upper-level jobs around here? Maybe one day I can be police chief?”
    He sat quiet again, and I felt the flood come.
    “Shit.” My voice quivered and I hated it. But he’d been there before.
    “I know.”
    “I got away from this place and the claws it has that drag you down and rip you up. I made sure I’d never be at its mercy again.” The tears overflowed.
“Never.”
    “I know,” he repeated.
    “I know you do. You’re the only one that does.” I gulped air. “Now I’m back, forced to kiss ass to stupid, closed-minded people that I wouldn’t wipe my shoes on a year ago.”
    He looked at me in the dark, and I felt the intensity of his eyes more than saw them. They glistened.
    “They aren’t all that way, Dani. Don’t brand them all.”
    I shook my head. “No, I know. I just—” I blew out a breath to try to calm down. “I just can’t stand the thought of Riley taking the crap for this. They’re gonna fuck with her, Alex, and I don’t know what I’m gonna do.”
    “You’ll be a mom. That’s all you can do.”
    “Yeah, I’ve been such a stellar example of that so far.”
    “You have. Look at