Recovery (Doctor Dom Volume 5) (A BDSM & Medical Play Novella) by Tara Crescent Read Free Book Online Page B

office.
    Lisa was pulling away from me. I could tell. And intellectually, I could understand why. I was shutting her out too. I wasn’t telling her I was feeling less afraid every day. My visceral dread was receding. I didn’t want her to be hopeful, and then ruin it if I couldn’t follow through.
    “She can’t live like this,” I said gloomily to Jackie.
    “Can you?” Jackie asked me.
    I started to say something, then I shut up. After Andrea, I could have sworn that I was done with D/s. But then Lisa happened, and I found everything I could ever want in a woman.
    For a month, I had the world. Even now, it was still there. But with each day that I hesitated, with each day I didn’t talk to her, with each day that I failed to reach out, the promise receded further away. I needed to grab it before it was too late.

Chapter 9
     
    Lisa:
    I’d gone home Thursday night, still moody, still frustrated, and I’d poured myself a glass of wine, and settled on my couch for some serious self-examination.
    In the end, after I’d talked myself into circles, I came up with a conclusion.
    I wasn’t going to be a bitch.
    Already, I could see myself turning into a bit of a shrew. I could see myself already holding back some part of myself from Patrick. And I didn’t want to engage in that kind of passive-aggressive emotional blackmail. To dramatically misquote Shawshank Redemption, I needed to get busy living, or get out of the relationship. And I didn’t want to break up with Patrick.
    I scolded myself, drank some more wine, and suggested that I act like an adult. Then I packed a couple of toys as a surprise, called a cab, and headed over to Patrick’s place.
    ***
    I rang the doorbell, and Patrick opened the door, and looked half-surprised, half-pleased when he saw me there.
    “ This is a nice surprise,” he said. “To what do I owe the pleasure?”
    “Patrick,” I giggled. The wine was causing me to simper like some kind of vapid Disney princess. “Whatcha doing?”
    “Are you drunk, Lisa?” He laughed at me, his voice low and sexy, and my insides clenched in the way they always did around Patrick.
    “ Kiss me and find out,” I suggested happily.
    “I thought you were annoyed with me,” he said carefully.
    “I was,” I replied. “I’m not right now. Right now, I’m just horny. Want to do something about it?”
    “ Not on the doorstep of my house,” he replied with a half-smile. “Come on in.”
    I followed him into the living room. “I brought a surprise,” I announced, holding my bag up. “Toys.”
    He raised an eyebrow. “You did indeed,” he replied. “What’s in it?”
    I looked directly at him as I pulled out the video camera from my bag. I normally used it to record client spaces so I would remember key details about the architecture. Not at this moment though. Right now, I wanted to use it to record Patrick and me having sex.
    “A camera?” His voice was surprised, his eyes gave nothing away. “Every time I think I get a handle on you, sweet Lisa, you astonish me in a new way.”
    “Want to use it?” I asked him. I needed the wine to summon up courage to ask him. It had seemed like a good plan when I had hatched it on my couch. After all, you only made a sex tape with someone you trusted deeply.
    I trusted Patrick. I needed to know that he trusted me too.
    He gave me an amused look. “For your on-screen performance,” he said, chuckling at me, “do you intend wearing that?” He pointed to my jeans, my t-shirt, my cable-knit sweater. These were not the sexiest clothes in the universe.
    “There’s lingerie in the bag as well,” I responded loftily, ruining the effect by hiccupping at the end.
    He shook his head at me. “Ah, drunk women and the trouble they get themselves in…” he said wryly.
    I rolled my eyes at him. “Yes, I believe that’s exactly the reason we slept together the first time,” I responded snidely, and he laughed again.
    “There is that,” he said. “Okay.