Roar by Aria Cage Read Free Book Online Page B

does enough for me which he doesn’t want to do.
    “There’s nothing to be sorry about. It’s my hang-up, not yours.”
    I nod and my eyes well with sad tears. I have taken so much, and I don’t want to take anymore.
    “Please come with us,” he asks for the millionth time.
    Nona, Davey, and Nate are going to a service for one of the residents of Willow Lakes. That’s where Nona and Davey go on those Thursdays, where other Down syndrome and disabled people live their lives and learn to look after themselves. But I won’t go, because now I need to figure out how to save Nate from me and my life.
    Tonight, I will go to my first party. Tonight, I will do everything I can to expel Nate from my world. He will hate me, he will be heartbroken, but he will be free like the bald eagle we saw at the sanctuary. It is time for him to live and thrive, be the champion and king he is in my heart. I want him to roar, but he never will be able to when he is harboring his broken wing―me.
    I wave them off, though it breaks my heart knowing it’s the last time I will see him while he loves me. I run to the house and scour my cupboard. I have nothing pretty, nothing revealing, so I go with one of my favorite black tees, tie it in a knot at my waist, and wear a pair of cut-offs with my black boots. I pull out my hair tie and allow my long brown hair to fall around my shoulders. I’m going to be late for this party, but that’s okay. I don’t need to be there long before I find Mason King. He looks at me with that look I recognize. I see it in Daddy’s eyes; I see it in Nate’s, in Mister Conway. They want something from me that I wish only Nate to have.
    But Nate needs to be set free, and I don’t want Daddy to have this. Anyone but him. So, anyone will be Mason. I know he will take my offering because I’ve heard whispers of how he’d like to take me under the bleachers and fuck me until Tuesday. I don’t understand that saying, but I get the meaning, and that’s all that matters.
    I have to walk there, but that’s okay, too; it gives me time to summon up the courage to do this. It’s hot even though the sun is setting. I feel sweat beading on my back. I don’t know if it’s from trepidation of what’s to come or from the heat. Either doesn’t matter, and doesn’t stay on my mind long as I hear the music, screams, and laughter from down the street. This is it; this is the beginning of the end. As soon as I walk up to the house, people begin to stare. Then, true to their nature, they continue to party because I’m no one to them. Someone hands me a red cup of fluid. I sniff and realize it’s beer, so I drink. I don’t sip; I scull it and recoil against the bitter taste.
    I walk through the door, into the mosh of kids from school and who knows. It’s hot, stuffy, and loud as I dump my empty cup on the entrance table and look at the blur of faces and stares.
    I head to where I think I will find him, where all the ball players will hang―by the keg out back, where police and bystanders don’t see. It’s pretty dumb since everyone is walking around with red cups anyway. No one will believe they hold sweet, innocent soda.
    I make it to the kitchen when Greg Parker sees me and whistles. There’s that look, and I smile.
    “Hi there, Charlie Bear. I never saw you at a party before.”
    “Well you see me now,” I say, sliding onto the kitchen bench, taking his cup from him and downing it, willing my stomach not to cramp like it wants.
    Greg wolf-whistles, drawing the attention of two other players of the Beavers, one of them being Mason. He stares at me and saunters over, and I smile over Greg’s plastic cup.
    I definitely need more beer if I am to go through with this. I shake my cup, not caring who will refill it. Greg takes it and is happy to. He, too, has that look, but with some sting to it. I need to be careful. I need to finish this, but I’m need to keep an eye on one target. I have Mason in my eyes, and I